


From The Very Beginning

by Clexa15



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Action, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Badass Lexa, Blood and Injury, Bodyguard, College Student Clarke Griffin, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, Protective Lexa, Romance, Slow Burn, Slow Burn Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Violence, bodyguard Lexa, no one dies, well there's smut in the beginning but oh well
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2018-06-09
Packaged: 2018-12-16 16:02:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 34,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11832165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clexa15/pseuds/Clexa15
Summary: Clarke's father, Jake Griffin, works for the U.S Military. Doing what, she's not so sure. He's never disclosed that type of information. Every time she asks she gets the same answer over and over."It's classified information."But when her life suddenly gets turned upside down, she's not sure she wants to know anymore.She gets thrown into a world of dark games. Kidnapping. Blood. Injury. And something about a chip. And the worst part? The person she hates most in the world, Lexa Woods, gets thrown in along with her. Can Clarke get herself out of the situation that she's suddenly found herself in? Or is she going to have to rely on Lexa, who seems to know a lot more than she lets on, to help her?And what's she supposed to do when her feelings for Lexa take a sudden turn? Surely she's not falling in love with her...right?





	1. Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> Another prompt given to me by a friend! 
> 
> Anddddd another story to add to my collection! This literally was supposed to be a one-shot but I got a little carried away. (okay, A LOT carried away) I' super excited about this one! I've always wanted to do a bodyguard AU as it's one of my favorites! 
> 
> For this first chapter I just want you all to know that this is an enemies to friends to lovers story. So don't be fooled by what you read here! This chapter just basically sets everything up for the chapters following! Things are gonna take a turn the next chapter so be prepared! 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy! And as always let me know what you all think! Kudos and comments are always appreciated! :)
> 
> Oh, and the summary is shit right now so it might change later. ;)

_“If you find me not within you, you will never find me. For I have been with you, from the very beginning.”_

* * *

Two bodies sat in the back of a dark van, each tied down by thick braided ropes. Their bodies swayed as the vehicle began to drive over rough terrain. One of the bodies, a blonde haired female, was desperately trying to get free of her bindings, her pale skin becoming a bright red as it rubbed against the ropes.

Across from her another female, brunette, simply rolled her eyes,“Would you stop that? You’re doing nothing but rubbing your skin raw. If I can’t get out of these ropes then you sure as hell can’t.”

The blonde huffed deeply, still trying to free herself,“I wouldn’t be in this situation if you hadn’t been stalking me like some crazy person. I would be safe at home and in my bed.”

“I told you I wasn’t stalking you. I just so happened to be getting home at the same time as you.”

“For the fifth time that week? Really, Lexa?” The blonde snapped.

The brunette, Lexa, decided it was best not to respond and instead began trying to sneak a peak through the almost blacked out backdoor window of the van. In the darkness, both in the van and outside, she could just barely make out the blur of trees from the window.

“It looks like they’re taking us into some woods. Judging by how long we’ve been driving we may be somewhere near the Prince William Forest Park,” Lexa spoke mainly to herself as she tried to calculate the distance that they had been traveling since she woke up in the van.

“What are you some human navigation system? How would you even know that?” Clarke commented snidely.

Lexa was just about to throw back a snide comment of her own when the van came to a halting stop causing both of them to fall on their sides onto the floor of the van. The sound of the vehicle’s doors opening and closing had Lexa pushing herself back up into a sitting position as fast as she could while the sound of footsteps made their way to the backdoor of the van. Lexa waited with baited breath as the double doors swung open to reveal two huge men. One with a shiny shave head, murky brown eyes and a long scar above his eyebrow. The other with shaggy black hair barely reaching past his chin, cold grey eyes, and a dragon tattoo curling around the side of his neck.

Next to her, Lexa could hear Clarke let out the tiniest of whimpers before steeling herself and pushing up off the van’s floor and next to Lexa.

“What the hell do you want with us?” Clarke demanded to know.

The bald man only snorted at the blonde’s sudden braveness before he grabbed ahold of Clarke’s ankle and pulled her towards him. Clarke let out a shocked yelp as she suddenly found herself within a hair’s breath of the man’s face.

“Your father has something my boss wants. So, he’s going to use _you_ to get it.”

* * *

_Five Months Ago…_

A pair of keys jingled noisily in the fingers of a pale hand. A beautiful curvy blonde sighed tiredly as she began clearing the flights of stairs that would lead her to her fifth story apartment.

Clarke Griffin was your average, everyday 24-year-old…or at least she liked to think so. Blonde hair that shone like the sun itself, deep cobalt eyes that put the ocean to shame, pale porcelain skin, and lips as soft as a lily’s petals. Yes, she was beautiful. Clarke knew she was, with the amount of suitors flocking her way it didn’t make it difficult for her to figure out. Since the ripe age of fifteen she had had her fair share of dates with guys, _and girls_ , alike…but none that really kept her interest.

She also liked to think her family life was fairly normal. Her mother, Abby Griffin, being head surgeon at DC’s largest hospital, Arkadia Memorial, and her father, Jake Griffin, working for the U.S. Military doing…well she wasn’t quite sure seeing as to how all of his work was classified. Her parents were constantly busy but they still made sure to spend some time with her, at least what their work schedules and her college classes would allow.

_Speaking of schedules…_

“God, I’m going to kill Harper for canceling our study group and not telling me. I could be in bed already,” Clarke mumbled under her breath as she finally reached the fifth floor.

Being in her second year of medical school was really taking it’s tole on her. It seemed like there was a never ending pile of homework and text books that demanded her attention every day which spurred an almost nonexistent sleeping schedule. Every living second that was free from school or helping her best friend Raven at her shop was spent in her bed. And at this very point in time she hadn’t seen her bed in almost twenty-four hours.

That was a crime in itself.

As she walked down the hallway towards her apartment Clarke allowed her eyes to drift close for a moment as she imagined herself sinking down into her satin sheets wearing nothing but her favorite oversized college sweater. So lost in her own little world and eyes still shut, Clarke had failed to notice the slender body, arms filled with boxes, that was making it’s way towards her.

“Shit!”

The blonde was jolted, quite literally, from her daydream as she knocked into the boxes, successfully sending herself and the person carrying them, to the ground. Clarke tumbled to the floor ungracefully, her ass smacking hard into the floor and causing her to wince. She took a moment to collect herself before looking up and over the mess of boxes and scattered belongings. In front of her was a - _the most_ \- gorgeous woman she had ever laid her eyes on. Soft brunette waves cascaded over her shoulder and left the right side of her delicate neck exposed, she wore a button down denim shirt tucked into black ripped skinny jeans, white vans completing the look.

Green eyes.

She was definitely a vision…at least until she started speaking.

“What the hell is your problem? Can’t you watch where you’re going?”

“Excuse me?” Clarke’s enamored stated for the woman’s beauty instantly deteriorated,“I wasn’t the one carrying a shit ton of boxes and not being cautious enough to watch for other people walking innocently down the hallway!”

“Exactly! I couldn’t _see_. You _weren’t_ the one carrying the boxes so _you_ should have been the one to see _me_. Or maybe you were just too caught up in that small brain of your’s to pay any attention to your surroundings.” The woman huffed as she picked herself off the floor and began collecting the items that were scattered about.

Clarke’s nose wrinkled angrily at the brunette’s words, a hot flush creeping up her neck and rushing around her ears,“Well, I’m so sorry my ‘small brain’ is currently sleep deprived due to all the _med school_ classes and study sessions that I take. And not to mention helping my best friend on top of that.”

She knew it was a stupid come back and she wanted nothing more than to wince as the words left her mouth. But Clarke couldn’t help but feel slightly smug as she saw the taller woman’s eyebrows shoot up towards her hairline a bit before schooling her features back into a scowl once more.

“You mean to tell me _you’re_ Clarke?”

The blonde reeled back, a bit surprised that the woman knew her name,“Yeah. How the hell do you know my name?”

The brunette looked her over for a second before turning back to finish repacking the boxes,“I’m Lexa. I just moved in across from you…unfortunately. My neighbor, in 5D, told me about you. Seems she’s quite…taken with you.”

Clarke’s angry flush swapped itself for an embarrassed blush. Niylah, the woman who she had slept with _one time_ after a party that Raven just had to throw at her apartment, was kind but just a bit clingy and pointblank. Clarke had no doubt in her mind that Niylah just let it ‘slip’ that they had slept together while telling Lexa all about her.

And judging by the way Lexa looked at her with a devious smirk that was exactly what happened.

“What I do on my own time is my business. Not yours,” Clarke huffed as she maneuvered around the mess and closed the short distance to her door, now noticing the boxes that lined the wall opposite of it.

“I think you mean _who_ ,” she heard Lexa say smugly.

She turned and pinned the brunette with a glare before pushing her way inside her apartment and slamming the door. As she leaned back against it she sore she could hear Lexa snort out a chuckle before her footsteps receded down the hallway. Clarke groaned inwardly as she replayed the last few minutes in her head.

The last thing she needed right now was for an insufferable new neighbor who _clearly_ thought that she was all high and mighty. And the fact that Clarke was instantly attracted to her, before she opened her mouth, didn’t help her cause any. Now she would have to dodge and weave to stay away from Lexa because there was no doubt that they would just continue to argue with one another just like they were seconds ago. And Clarke didn’t have time nor the patience to deal with that. Not with midterms coming up. No way.

A small shuffle outside her door caught her attention and had her turning around to investigate through the glass peep hole on her door. Blue eyes adjusted through the lens to see Lexa lugging more boxes into her apartment. Clarke couldn’t help but bite her lip to stifle the moan that left her throat. The brunette had removed her denim shirt to reveal a tank top underneath leaving her slightly muscular arms bare and showing off a tattoo on her right bicep. The white material clung to her abdomen and, as Lexa walked back out her apartment, she could clearly see the outline of abs.

Breathless, Clarke pushed herself away from her door and tried to collect herself. She was supposed to be angry at Lexa, not getting herself hot and bothered by the image of her in a tank top. The woman had insulted her brain for crying out loud! Anger spiking, Clarke moved further into her apartment and threw her bag onto the couch before making her way towards the kitchen for a much needed beer.

As she popped the top off and took a long sip she felt her phone vibrate in her back pocket. Pulling it out a smile ghosted across her face as Raven’s name and a picture of the fiery Latina covered the screen. Clarke hit the accept button before taking a seat at her dining room table.

“Hey, how’s my favorite mechanic?”

“She’s doing fucking awesome!” Raven all but yelled into the phone,“I just finished fixing that car today, you know the one for that senator guy or whatever he is? He payed me triple what I normally charge! So, how about you and me hit up that new club, Polis, downtown? Food and drinks on me!”

Clarke giggled a bit as she took another swig of her beer,“Hell yes. You think I would turn down free food and drinks? Not a chance. Plus I could totally use the distraction right now.”

“Oh? Something got your panties in a twist?”

“More like _someone_ ,” Clarke scoffed,“I’ll tell you when we get to Polis because I have to get ready, unless you want me to pick me up while I’m wearing sweat pants and an old t-shirt.”

Raven’s laugh flowed through the phone’s speaker,“You’d probably still be able to pick up a major hottie even in sweats, but I’d prefer you in something else. Why not pull out that sexy blue number in the back of your closet? Give it a little ride around the club tonight. I mean, we are technically celebrating.”

“It _has_ been a while since I wore it,” Clarke said as she played with her now half empty beer bottle,“Why the hell not? Give me about thirty minutes and I’ll be ready.”

“Sure! I’ll see you soon princess,” Raven said.

Clarke cringed at the nickname,“I should really strangle Fin for getting you started on that name.”

“Well, I don’t feel like bailing you out of jail tonight so that’ll have to wait. Now, go get ready!” Raven teased before hanging up.

Clarke sat her phone down on the table as she stood up and made her way towards her room. Thankfully she had taken a shower that morning and only needed to apply her makeup and fix up her hair that was currently thrown up in a messy ponytail. Walking into her ensuite bathroom she flipped the light switch and walked over to the counter where her makeup bag currently sat. She looked herself over in the mirror for a minute before deciding that she would stay light on the makeup.

She applied some eyeshadow, giving her eyes a light smoky look, followed by a bit of mascara, and then a natural colored lip gloss. Makeup done, Clarke was ready to start on the real problem…her wild hair. Normally her hair flowed down her back in natural loose waves but thanks to her putting it up in a bun while wet it was currently in misshapen curls. Sighing, Clarke realized that she would have to pull out her curling iron to fix the damage down to it.

Fifteen minutes after pulling out the curling iron Clarke was running her fingers through bouncy waves to give them a somewhat more natural look. With a quick once over she deemed herself ready to get dressed and realized she had barely enough time to do so before Raven would show up. True to her word, once she had made it back into her room and over to the closet, Clarke reached towards the back and pulled out the ‘blue sexy number’ that Raven insisted she wear.

After chucking her sweats and t-shirt into the laundry hamper in the corner of her room, Clarke pulled the dress up her body and smiled at the snug fit. She instantly fell in love with the dress after trying it on during a weekend shopping trip with Raven. The dress was a sleeveless bandage bodycon dress and was a deep blue that made her eyes simply sparkle and pop. The last time she had worn this dress she found herself bringing home a nice bit of company in the form of an all too willing female, not that she was complaining.

Just as she was slipping into her nude heels, the sound of her front door opening and closing caught her attention.

“Princess! Are you ready yet? I’ve been outside for like ten minutes!” Raven’s voice carried down the hallway.

Clarke rolled her eyes as she grabbed her bag off her bed and walked out the bedroom. The Latina was currently leaning against the wall at the edge of the hallway messing with her nails until she caught sight of the blonde.

“About damn time. I thought I would have to send a search party.”

Blue eyes rolled once more,“I literally have two minutes left from the thirty I told you I needed. It’s not my fault you’re impatient.”

“Whatever,” Raven said as she pushed herself off the wall and grabbed Clarke’s hand to begin dragging her towards the door,“Let’s go! I’m ready to drink to my hearts content. I got us a Lyft for the night, that way we won’t end up walking home like last time.”

Clarke laughed as she closed and locked the door behind her,“You mean when _I_ had to walk home and carry you all the way?”

“Hey, to be fair, I walked for a good five minutes before my legs turned to jelly,” Raven said as they made their way down the flights of stairs.

“Sure you did,” Clarke scoffed.

The banter was light between them as they reached the ground floor. Exiting the building Clarke allowed Raven to lead her over to where their driver waited patiently for them. The man, no more than two years older than them, kindly opened the door for them before shutting it softly behind them. The ride to the club was filled with music and laughter and a surprise mini flask of vodka that Raven had pulled out from God knows where. Before long their driver was pulling to a stop at the front of Polis.

After thanking the man and checking to make sure their scheduled pick up time was correct both ladies made their way towards the entrance of the club. The line outside the large double doors would have had anyone groaning at the thought of the long wait but Clarke didn’t even spare it a second glance. Not when she had Raven Reyes with her. Her best friend knew how to whip her high ponytail around, bat her eyelashes, flaunt the perfect curve of her ass, and get what she wanted.

_Every time._

So, the sharp glares and loud gasps as the somewhat flustered bouncer moved the velvet rope aside for them to enter didn’t have any effect on either of them. They were used to it. And neither Clarke nor Raven cared about any thing else than getting some alcohol running through their systems and dancing the night away on the dance floor.

Polis was almost like any other club in Washington just…larger. The floor ahead of them was filled with a sea of bodies, all moving along with the beat of the music pumping loudly through the speakers. A few tables were scattered through the large area. Each one already filled with people drinking and mingling. The wall opposite them held a bar, stretching from one end of the club to the other. The right wall was lined with nothing but booths, brimming with college students and a few older patrons as they drank the night away. On the other side, the left wall, was a DJ’s booth that was currently filled with some hot new DJ currently jumping along with the music himself as he turned a few knobs and dials on the soundboard.

Blue eyes caught a winding metal staircase and when Clarke looked up she caught sight of the lavish VIP loft area. Another bar, smaller than the one on the ground floor, sat in the center. A few tables sat along the edge near the railing but the rest of the VIP section was filled with five round leather couches. Each one blocked off by velvet ropes and surrounded by sheer white curtains. In the center of each couch was a low glass table, each housing a chilled bottle of wine and sparkling wine glasses.

_Fancy_.

But Clarke wasn’t worried about the VIP section right now. Her mind was focused on getting her and Raven through the crowd and over to the bar to order the strongest drink they had. She would need to drink her weight in alcohol to forget about the rude ass that was her new neighbor. Pale hands gripped onto the Latina’s hands and began to lead them through the sweating bodies, not caring too much when they were bumped into. Everyone was pretty much drunk off their asses and stumbling into anything and everything.

“Long Island Ice Tea, please,” Clarke yelled out to the bartender as they finally reached the bar and occupied two seats.

Raven yelled her order to the bartender as well before he disappeared to make their drinks. They waited a few moments in comfortable silence, each one surveying the bar. Not five minutes later their drinks were placed in front of them, signaling for the beginning of a night filled with alcohol.

“So,” Raven began as she sipped her Jungle Juice,“You going to tell me about this _someone_ who's got your panties in a twist?”

Clarke rolled her eyes and took a long swig of her drink to prepare herself for the oncoming story.

“Some woman moved into the apartment across from mine today. She was carrying a loud of boxes, which she shouldn’t have been doing because she obviously couldn’t see, and ran straight into me. Then she had the gull to cuss me out about how _I_ should have been the one to watch where I was going. Then she made a comment about being too caught up in my ‘small brain’ to pay attention to my surroundings -don’t even say anything, Reyes,” Clarke quickly cut her off when Raven opened her mouth,“And apparently she met _Niylah_ when she got in, so you know how that goes.”

Raven’s heard the stories of the blonde and how she pretty much bragged to anyone who came near Clarke that they had slept together. Basically it was just her trying to claim someone that wasn’t really her’s to begin with. Someone that would _never_ be her’s.

“I told her what I do on my own time is my own business and she fucking smirks and says ‘I think you mean _who_ ’. Like, really? Who does that?”

“Damn, Griffin. You’ve got it bad,” Raven said as she casually sipped her drink and stared at her friend.

“What do you mean?”

“Obviously, both of you were clearly wrong. You’re neighbor…does she have a name?”

“Lexa,” Clarke said begrudgingly.

“Lexa, okay. Obviously, Lexa shouldn’t have been carrying so many boxes and _obviously_ you shouldn’t have been stuck up in Griffin wonderland like you always are. Both of you should have been paying attention. So therefore, you both were in the wrong,” Raven shrugged.

Clarke gripped her drink a little tighter in her hand. Of course, Raven Reyes just _had_ to pop in with her logic and bring down Clarke’s mood. The blonde knew it was stupid, but she automatically put all the blame on the brunette because she _knew_ that she had been in the wrong. She knew that she should have been paying attention to her surroundings instead of daydreaming like she had been. But her damn pride wouldn’t let her live up to it. Instead, her damn pride mouthed the first thing she thought of after Lexa’s words were spat into her face. Which lead to her blaming the brunette.

“Ugh, why are you always like this, Raven?” Clarke said as she rested her head onto the bar.

“Just perks of being a fucking genius,” Raven said smugly,“Besides, I haven’t even told you the other half of what I’m thinking.”

Clarke’s head shot up from the table, brow crinkling in confusion,“What are you talking about?”

Raven cocked an eyebrow in her direction as she downed the rest of her drink,“How you have the hots for Lexa.”

Clarke, who had been in the middle of sipping her drink, choked a bit as the alcohol went down the wrong pipe and burned the back of her throat. Coughing a bit, she took a few deep breathes before glaring over at her friend.

“I’m sorry, you think I have to _hots_ for Lexa. A woman I don’t even know who was completely rude to me as soon as I met her?” Clarke asked, bewildered.

“Well duh. There’s like crazy sexual tension floating around you when you say her name. You think she’s hot and you want a piece of her,” Raven said nonchalantly as she flagged down the bartender for another drink.

Clarke sat back in her seat, contemplating her best friend’s words. She wasn’t wrong. She’d felt something akin to desire when she had first set eyes on the woman sprawled out on the floor in front of her. But that had quickly switched to anger when she opened her mouth and after that changed to wanton desire when she watched her through her peep hole. Clarke bit her lip, keeping herself silent as she was afraid she might say something that would just dig her further into the hole that Raven had pushed her into. She turned in her chair and let her eyes wonder over the crowded club as she listened to Raven thank the bartender for her drink. As she down a healthy sip of her drink blue eyes caught a familiar form making it’s way towards the bar.

Brunette waves.

Sharp jawline.

Powerful frame.

Tan skin.

_Green eyes._

Fucking Lexa.

Clarke quickly spun back in her chair, set her drink down on the glass surface of the bar, and grabbed ahold of Raven’s hand that held her fresh drink.

“Lexa’s fucking here. She’s coming this way,” Clarke bit out.

Raven promptly wiggle her hand out of Clarke’s grasp and began craning her neck upwards in search for the brunette, even though she had no clue what she looked like,“Where? I want to see the fine piece of ass that’s caught your attention.”

“Would you stop looking,” Clarke yelped as she turned Raven’s head from Lexa’s direction,“And she hasn’t caught my attention. She’s just an asshole that I can’t stand.”

“You literally talked to her for five minutes,” Raven snorted, still trying to look over her shoulder for the mysterious woman.

Clarke went to make a snappy comeback before she felt someone settle into the empty seat beside her and the smooth, commanding voice flow from them towards the bartender.

“Whiskey. Neat.”

And Clarke wanted to snort. She knew that voice. Even after only hearing it for five minutes. And leave it to Lexa to be old fashioned and drink _whiskey_ at a club. Clarke’s back was ridged as she tired to subtly turn her body away from Lexa, trying not to draw attention to herself. She caught Raven’s eyes and watched her mouth ‘Is that her?’ as she nodded her head towards the brunette. Clarke just widened her eyes a bit and shook her head as if to tell her ‘not right now’.

After the bartender had set her drink down in front of her Clarke was sure that Lexa was going to take her leave, disappear in the crowd and away from Clarke. Obviously, fate had other plans.

“You know I’m not the least bit surprised that I ran into you here,” Lexa’s smoothed voice flowed into her ear.

Clarke’s head whipped around, her brain long forgotten that she was trying to keep her distance from the brunette,“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, you seem like the typical blonde who likes to party. Comes out with friends, drinks her weight in alcohol, and passes out drunk in bed only to wake up with a killer hang over the next day,” Lexa explained.

Typical blonde? Oh, she’ll show her _typical_.

But before she could respond beside her, Raven snorted. Almost losing her drink through her nose in the process. Lexa smirked and Clarke glared at the Latina. The blonde’s cheeks flushed. Raven had snorted because she knew Lexa was right. Time and time again had that exact same scenario played out for Clarke during a night out with friends…not that she would admit that to Lexa. Well, now she didn’t have to because Raven all but confirmed it for her.

“Even your friend knows I’m right,” Lexa smirked into her glass of whiskey.

Clarke’s nostrils flared as Raven stood from her seat and moved over to the empty chair beside Lexa. The Latina sat down and offered her hand to the brunette who promptly accepted it.

“Raven Reyes. I’m the best friend. I’ve heard a bit about you through this one’s whining, but you don’t seem as bad as she lets on.”

“Lexa Woods,” The brunette replies simply,“What exactly has she said about me?”

“Oh, just a few things here and there. Nothing important. Although…,” Raven trailed off as her eyes darted over to Clarke and the blonde’s own blue orbs widened in horror,“I did mention that I felt a bit of sexual tension whenever she said your name. Maybe there’s something you can do to help that.”

And just like that, Raven was gone. Disappearing into the crowd and leaving her there with the rude ass that had insulted her brain. When she found Raven she was going to use every bit of her medial expertise to make sure she suffered a slow death.

“Well she’s…something,” Lexa drawled out as she finished the rest of her whiskey.

Clarke only rolled her eyes, downed the rest of her drink, and stood from her chair. The blonde silently prayed that the brunette wouldn’t follow her as she made her way towards the bathroom. As she entered the lady’s room Clarke found it surprisingly empty. She honestly didn’t know why she was in here. She didn’t need to use the bathroom. But she didn’t feel like facing Lexa just yet. So she strut over to the sink and washed her hands, fixed her hair, and just tried to find anything to do other than go back out and see green eyes staring into her’s.

A soft click had Clarke’s eyes darting up and into the mirror. Lexa leaned heavily against the door, hands in her pockets, and locked clicked into place. No one would be coming in. Clarke had to swallow past a lump in her throat at the thought.

“What do you want, Lexa? Why are you here?”

Lexa didn’t answer. Instead, she calmly pushed away from the door and made her way towards the blonde. Clarke was a deer caught in the headlights. No where to go as she was backed against the bathroom counter. She almost let out a yelp as her ass came into contact with the smooth marble, her hands gripping the edge to steady her suddenly shaking knees. Lexa was now in her personal space, breathing the same air as her, eyes flickering down to pink lips.

“You’re friend did say something about sexual tension. Maybe she’s right. Maybe there’s something I can do to help you,” Lexa said dangerously low.

A jolt ran down to Clarke’s core. The huskiness of Lexa’s voice. The alcohol burning through her bloodstream. Or the fact that they were in the bathroom of a club, only a lock and five inches of wood separating them from someone walking in on them. It had to have been one of those things that had her throwing herself onto Lexa.

They became a tangled mess. Lips clashing, teeth nipping, and tongues battling. Hands snuck under clothes, smoothed across heated skin and deliciously tightened their hold on hips. Clarke’s lips broke away from Lexa’s as she was hauled up onto the counter. Her head tipped back and she raked her nails down the fabric of Lexa’s shirt as the brunette trailed fiery kisses down the column of her throat. Clarke moaned out, her back arching as warm hands pushed under her dress, her bra, and cupped full breasts.

“Fuck, Clarke,” Lexa moaned out as she kneaded the soft mounds.

Clarke’s breath raged faster in her chest at the sensations. Her brain couldn’t -didn’t- want to process what she was about to do with this woman. A woman who she had only met some few hours ago. A woman who she felt a sort of hatred for, yet also a bit of warmth for. A warmth she couldn’t yet explain. But right now, none of that seemed to matter.

And just as Clarke’s hands were about to reach down and tug the hem of her dress up and over her head, a loud bag sounded from the door. Both women jumped but didn’t move too far away from each other.

“Open the damn door! Some people have to pee too ya know!” A slurred voice sounded from outside.

Clarke only had enough time to roll her eyes before her face was being turned back to Lexa and her lips were devouring her’s again. After a few seconds of just kissing and nipping, tasting, did they break apart. Lexa rested her forehead against Clarke’s and tried to control her ragged breathing.

“How about we get out of here?” Lexa suggested.

“You’re place or mine?”

“Mine’s closer,” Lexa joked.

“Mine’s probably cleaner,” Clarke rasped.

And suddenly Clarke was being lifted, hands of steel gripping her thighs and helping them wrap around strong hips. Her arms linked around a delicate neck as Lexa carried her across the bathroom before slamming her into the door. Clarke gasped as the brunette’s hips rolled into her’s, her head falling back with a low thump against the door.

“You’re place it is then.”

Clarke felt like whining as Lexa let her slide back down to the floor, helping fix her dress as soon as her feet touch the ground. Once fixed and presentable Lexa unlocked the door and pushed Clarke hastily through it, barely missing the drunk female that waited at the door who barely paid them any mind before rushing inside. Both women quickly paid their tabs, Clarke ordering a quick shot and throwing it back as she waited for Lexa. She tried to look for Raven so she could give her the signal that she was leaving but she couldn’t seem to find the Latina anywhere. But all her thoughts of her friend disappeared as she felt someone at her back, hands slinking around her hips and warm breath against her ear.

“Let’s get out of here,” Lexa smooth voice commanded as she pushed her forward.

Clarke couldn’t really remember how she ended up outside the club or how she ended up in Lexa’s car, the brunette still perfectly fine to drive after barely having one drink. All that seemed to swirl around her mind was Lexa. The feeling of Lexa’s lips against her’s. On her skin. Hands kneading her breasts helplessly. Her tongue against her skin. She shivered as she imagined it in _other_ places. And still, she couldn't fathom why she so badly wanted Lexa. She was supposed to hate her. She had insulted her for crying out loud. But yet her body still called to her. Begged to pull her closer and just feel her body against her’s. She wanted her. And there was no stopping it. Not now.

The ride back was shorter than Clarke remember. Maybe it was the alcohol or just the pure lust coursing through her veins. Whichever it was she was grateful. Because it lead to her being pushed up against the corridor wall just that much faster. As Lexa switched them around, kept pinning Clarke against the wall again and again, the blonde tried to find her keys. When she finally found them she almost dropped them when Lexa nipped particularly hard on her pulse point causing Clarke to moan out as she felt wetness pool between her thighs.

She physically had to push Lexa away so she could unlock her door, but even then Lexa was pushing her against the door. Pulling Clarke’s ass to grind against her hips and running her lips down her clothed spine. And when she finally got the door open the brunette didn’t hesitate to push her inside, quickly finding the couch and throwing her down onto it, pinning her there.

“Don’t move. I’ll be right back.”

And Lexa was gone. Out the door and leaving Clarke a breathless mess on her couch. She waited what felt like hours before she finally pushed herself up from the leather surface, figuring that Lexa wasn’t coming back. As she rounded the couch her door opened to reveal Lexa once again. Green met blue and they locked together.

“Didn’t I tell you not to move?” Lexa asked as she stalked towards the blonde.

Clarke’s center throbbed with need at the commanding tone. She wasn’t normally one for plays of dominance but something about letting Lexa dominate her had dripping. Too lost in her thoughts she failed to notice when the brunette finally reached her. Hands suddenly gripped her hips and turned her around to lean over the back of her couch, ass out and back arching. And she suddenly found why Lexa disappeared those few minutes as the woman pressed her hips into her’s and the feeling of a firm length was pressed into her ass.

Clarke moaned for all that she was worth when she realized just what Lexa had planned for her. What she planned to use on her. The blonde’s walls clenched around nothing at the anticipation and she almost begged for Lexa to hurry up.

“Answer me, Clarke. Didn’t I tell you not to move?” Lexa asked again her hips jogging forward slightly.

“Yes,” Clarke husked out.

And just when Clarke thought she was going to have to beg for it, have to be punished for moving, she felt Lexa’s hands push her dress up and grab ahold of the side of her panties. Her shrill gasp rang around her apartment as the brunette ripped the fabric from her skin and let it fall to the floor in tattered pieces. She squirmed as the cool air met her dripping center and she mewled at the feeling. She wiggled her hips a bit as she listened to Lexa pop the button on her jeans and push them down to her knees to reveal the harness strapped around her person. The strap-on bounced slightly as it sprung from it’s confides and Clarke gasped as it moved against her skin.

“You’re lucky I’m feeling generous tonight. Any other time and it would be different,” Lexa ground out as she ran the rubber shaft along Clarke’s center,“Are you ready?”

Clarke could only reply with a breathless nod. This wasn’t by far what she expected but she wasn’t complaining. The alcohol burned through her body and made her do crazy things. She was sure had she not downed that last shot that she would be sending Lexa back to her own apartment. But right now, she was glad she took that shot.

A low moan, her back arching, hands trying to grip the leather couch beneath her as Lexa pushed forward. Sinking deliciously into her. And as Lexa bottomed out neither one could stop the moans that escaped them. She was glad that the woman stilled for a few moments and let her adjust to the length before pulling out and quickly pushing forward once more. As she began to pick up her pace, Clarke skin tingled.

It burned with need and desire and had her absolutely melting against the couch. Her body jerked forward with every one of Lexa’s thrusts and she couldn’t stop her head from turning so she could peer over her shoulder at the woman. In the midst of everything, Lexa had removed her shirt, leaving her clad only in a sports bra and her jeans still around her knees, slowly falling her ankles. Her eyes drifted down to Lexa’s abs as they clenched with every thrust and they suddenly spurred another moan from Clarke. Then Lexa’s eyes found her’s and everything changed.

Lexa quickly pulled away, spun her around and lifted her up. With some fumbling and almost tripping the brunette had removed herself from her pants and was quickly moving them towards god knows where. The only thing Clarke was worried about at the moment was having Lexa back inside her and thrusting. Her body tensed in pleasure as her back hit a wall and Lexa was pinning her hips there, lining back up at her entrance and slipping inside without hesitation, pulling her dress up and over her head in the rush, leaving her completely bare.

Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa’s neck and let her head fall back as the brunette pounded away inside her. She was sure she could hear the pictures on her wall rattle with each thrust but she didn’t care. Didn’t care if one fell and sprayed glass all over the floor below their feet. All that mattered was Lexa and her release. Swift thrust after swift thrust had Clarke moaning loudly.

“Bed? Where’s you’re bedroom, Clarke?” Lexa asked breathlessly.

“Hallway. First door. On the left,” Clarke said between moans.

And this time, as Lexa moved them down the hallway, she stayed seated inside Clarke. Velvet walls clenched desperately around the shaft, wishing that Lexa would hurry up so she could _move_. They moved fast but not fast enough. And Clarke couldn’t stop herself from lifting up slightly and sinking back down onto the shaft. Lexa halted, pushing her back against the nearest wall and stilling her hips before jogging her own forward with a few hard thrusts.

“Stay still,” Lexa commanded.

Clarke keened. Wanting nothing more than to feel Lexa move. _Now_. But she stopped. The sooner they got to her room the sooner Lexa could pound away inside her. Help coax her to that amazing release that she was teetering on the edge of. She needed it. Craved it.

Finally, _finally_ they fell back against her bed, still joined, and Lexa didn’t even stop to warn her before driving her hips back and forward once more. Clarke cried out at the sudden movement and held onto Lexa as she slammed forward again and again and again. She was finally getting what she wanted but it was becoming too much. She could feel herself loosing control. Slipping towards the stars and that white hot fire that felt so good as it consumed her being.

She tried to protest when Lexa pulled completely out, only to moan deeply when she was flipped over and her hips were raised into the air and she was being filled again. The stretch and the angle had Clarke searching for something to hold onto. To ground her as Lexa’s hips lunged forward with abandonment, but still gentle all the same. Hands clung to her hips, helping her drive them back to meet each one of Lexa’ thrusts. And Lexa angled her hips just right, hitting that spot inside Clarke over and over and over again.

“Yes, Lexa. Right there. _Please_ , don’t stop,” Clarke whined out as she drove her hips back as much as she could with Lexa’s help.

Once more, she was turning to peak over her shoulder. Once more, blue met green. And suddenly Clarke was soaring. That white hot fire filling her vision and sending her spiraling as wave after wave rushed through her being. Her moans filled the room, along with Lexa’s as she felt the woman’s hips falter and she was sure the brunette was coming just as hard as she was. The woman’s weight settled gently over her back, still seated deep within her, and warm breathe ghosted over her bare back.

Clarke’s vision grew hazy. Her buzz and climax mixing together and making her body slump forward with exhaustion. She felt lips brush against her shoulder before she felt Lexa’s weight lift off her and the shaft inside her slip out. A low groan slipped from her throat at the feeling, but she was much too tired to voice her complaints. Her eyes fluttered, dangerously close to falling shut and letting her drift off into the wonderful world of dreams. She hadn’t expected tonight to end like this. In bed with a woman that she just met and couldn’t stand, but she couldn’t bring herself to regret it. Couldn’t bring herself to admit that, if given the chance, she wouldn’t change anything that happened tonight.

Finally her dark lashes fluttered once more before falling shut completely. And just before her mind was flung off the edge of unconsciousness she felt a light brush against her forehead and a blanket cover her naked form.

“Good night, Clarke,” Lexa whispered before she was lost to the world.

 


	2. One Hell Of A Job

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter you'll get a little background about how Lexa was hired for the job. It's not a lot of detail but there will be more on it so don't worry about that. Also, I'll be going into more detail on the 'anger' that Lexa and Clarke feel towards each other in later chapters. Right now emotions are kind of all over the place and still settling. So don't get comfortable with them! There's still a lot more that needs to be explained but for now I'm just setting up the bases. 
> 
> Enjoy! ;)

A light groan flittered from the bed, a mess of blonde hair turning over before falling back against the plush pillow. Blue eyes peaked out from cracked lids, being careful of the bright sunlight that spilled through the curtains. Clarke stared at the ceiling trying to figure out what had woken her up. A movement to her right caught her peripheral vision making her whip her head in its direction.

A bare back, one etched with an intricate tattoo, sat at the edge of her bed. Her heart jumped, her brain momentarily lapsing at who she thought was a stranger…until her eyes darted up and met brunette waves. Now, she wished it was a stranger. She slowly sat up in bed and watched as Lexa rose her hips off the bed slightly to pull her jeans from the night before onto her body. Clarke couldn’t stop her jaw from falling open as Lexa pulled a shirt over her head, the muscles of her back moving and clenching as she moved, faint red lines appearing across her skin. Flashes of the night before ran through her mind.

Her nails raking across tan skin. Something that she had been too gone to notice. Too overcome with pleasure. Lexa’s hips thrusting quickly. Sweat coating their bodies as they made their way from the couch to her wall and finally, the bed. The images were so clear, so detailed as she remembered them, that her body was being to become overrun by the same sensations as the night before.

“Are you just going to keep staring or are you going to say something?”

Clarke blanched, her eyes darting to the back of Lexa’s head. The woman hadn’t even turned around as far as she knew. How the hell did she know she was staring?

“What time is it?” The blonde asked lamely.

She visibly flinched at the answer. Her mind couldn’t form the right response to her question so she asked the first thing that came to mind. What were you supposed to say to someone, that you clearly had a dislike for, after you wake up in bed together? Naked.

Lexa sighed, pushing herself up from the bed before reaching over to Clarke’s bedside table and grabbing her phone,“Its time for me to leave. I shouldn’t have even stayed here. It was a mistake.”

Clarke reeled back as if struck.

“A mistake? How was any of last night a mistake?”

“Look, I don’t sleep with -,” Lexa cut herself off, jaw clenching as she snapped it shut.

“What? Sleep with a person you clearly made the first move on?” Clarke asked, clutching her sheet tighter to her bare chest.

She could see Lexa struggle to find words for a moment.

“We were both drinking last night, Clarke. You and I both know how that typically goes.”

Clarke bolted out the bed, dragging the sheet along with her, as Lexa made her way out the bedroom towards the front door.

“You know damn well it wasn’t the alcohol. I had a few drinks and was probably a little buzzed but you… _you_ had one little glass of whiskey. You don’t get to blame this on us being drunk.”

Lexa whipped around, eyes blazing,“Then let’s not blame it on the alcohol. In fact, let’s not blame it on anything. As far as anyone else is concerned this never happened. How about we just forget about this and just move on.”

Clarke’s heart jumped painfully, both with hurt and anger. She wasn’t so sure why Lexa asking just to pretend like last night never happened made her feel this way. She’d had her fair share of one night stands and she had never felt this way about them. Maybe it was the way Lexa simply tried to label it as a mistake. Or maybe it was the fact that Clarke didn’t want to forget about it.

“So you just want to forget everything that happened yesterday? Like we never even met?” Clarke growled, Lexa nodding her head stiffly in reply,“I know I wasn’t the only one to feel something… _different_ last night, Lexa. There was something there that I’ve never felt before with someone and I know you had to feel it to. No one does… _that_ , makes someone feel that way, and wants to forget about it.”

Lexa pursed her lips, eyes shifting over to the exit before turning back to the blonde,“I don’t know what you felt but clearly I didn’t feel it. Last night was a mistake and that’s all I’m going to say on the matter.”

Clarke’s jaw became slack, not believing the words that came from the brunette. Her head was pounding from the slight hangover and the conversation they were holding. She couldn’t begin to understand what was running through Lexa’s own mind at the moment. Something had to have happened for the brunette to want to be so detached from anything resembling a relationship…or at least a one night stand.

But that didn’t stop the rage from over taking Clarke.

“Fine, you want to forget?” Clarke stormed over to her door and yanked it open after unlocking it,“Leave. I don’t know you so I don’t know why you’re in my apartment.”

Lexa’s eyes widened for a moment, caught off guard by Clarke’s action, before steeling herself and walking out the door. Clarke watched her stand in the middle of the hallway for a second before turning around as if checking to see if Clarke was still standing there. She noticed her hands balled into fists at her sides, knuckles white with the force of the grip…almost as white as when she had gripped her hips last night. A thought suddenly popped into her head. The blonde held up a finger, signaling for Lexa to wait a moment.

Leaving the door open, Clarke rushed to her bedroom searching for the object that had popped into her mind. After a few seconds of searching she finally found it resting on the floor at the foot of her bed. Grabbing it, Clarke strode back to her front door. Lexa still stood in the hallway, arms folded over her chest and looking down the corridor as she waited for the blonde.

Clarke came to a stop at the door and threw the object harshly at the brunette before she was able to realize that she had returned.

* * *

**Shift In POV (Lexa)**

After Clarke disappeared back into her apartment Lexa couldn’t stop herself from eyeing the hallway for any signs of threats. Force of habit after the last few years of work that she’s done. She contemplated going inside her apartment and leaving Clarke to simmer in her anger alone, but she knew it would only make her even irritated. An older man coming up the stairs a little ways down the hallway caught her attention and she studied him like she would anybody else.

She was too caught up watching him disappear up the next flight of stairs to realize that Clarke had reappeared back in the doorway. Something solid hit her chest, leaving her just the slightest bit winded, and she fumbled to catch it before it could fall to the floor.

“I believe that belongs to you. Next time, don’t leave your things in my apartment. Oh, never mind, there won’t be a next time,” Clarke growled.

Lexa was able to stop herself from jumping as the door in front of her slammed closed. She knew the force rattled some of the picture frames hanging on the blonde’s walls and was surprised not to hear at least one of them crash to the ground. Lexa sighed deeply as she tried to calm her racing mind.

She wasn’t sure what had come over her last night. Be it the small bit of whiskey, the blue eyes, the luscious curves that were perfectly hugged by blue fabric, soft kissable lips—.

 _ **“Stop it, Woods. You’re supposed to be keeping an eye on her not getting into her pants,”**_ Lexa thought bitterly, as she looked down at the object in her hands.

She almost laughed as she grasped the leather straps to strap on. The last place she thought she would end up this morning was out in the hallway with a strap on in her hands. Then again, she didn’t expect to fall asleep in Clarke’s bed either. Hell, she didn’t expect to get anywhere near the woman’s bed unless she was in danger. Lexa had a strict rule against sleeping with clients, whether they were the one that hired her or not. It was a big ‘no’ in her books.   
  
_**“But that didn’t stop you from walking into that bathroom last night, did it?”**_

Lexa huffed and let her hands fall to her sides, the toy dangling in her left hand. Her eyes scanned the hallway once more before fishing her keys from her pocket and unlocking her door. She took one more glance over her shoulder at Clarke’s door before pushing all the way inside and quietly shutting the door. Inside, she reached over and flipped the light switch, filling the apartment with light and making her squint her eyes a bit so they could adjust.

She sat the toy down on the back of her couch as she moved to walk down the hallway. Three doors lined the hallway, two on the left and one of the right. She pushed open the last one on left and flipped the light switch. The room was plain besides a simple desk, a computer sitting neatly on top, a rolling chair, and a large pin board covering almost the entire right wall.

Rubbing her hands over her face, Lexa made her way over to the desk and started the computer. It only took a few seconds for the screen to blink to life, waiting for her to enter a password. She plopped down into the leather chair as she absentmindedly keyed in the password. A simple white screen greeted her as she was granted access. The brunette clicked on a single folder located in the upper left corner, entering in yet another password so she could access it.

The screen automatically filled with a video feed.

A live video feed.

Featuring the woman who left her standing in the hallway…with a strap on in her hand.

_Clarke._

Lexa sighed as she leaned back into her chair. This was the one thing that made her uncomfortable about this job. About keeping an eye on Clarke. Her parents had forced the camera into her job description no matter how much she insisted she didn’t need it. It made her feel like a complete creep knowing that every second of Clarke’s day was being saved onto her computer. And being paid to watch her from it made her skin crawl even more with unease.

The camera that Clarke’s father had secretly installed right before she moved in gave her the perfect view of the blonde’s open floor plan. Even gave her a good view down the hall to her bedroom door. She had been more than relieved when her parents only forced the one camera. If one had been in Clarke’s bedroom she would have more than likely declined. That was too much…even if she’s already slept with the woman.

Currently, Clarke mingled around her kitchen, still wrapped in the sheet, as she made coffee. Lexa had to stop herself more than once as her eyes began to travel the path of Clarke’s body. Eyes on the windows. Eyes on any entrances into the apartment. She repeated this as a mantra in her head and it was beginning to work…until the blonde decided she was done holding the only thing covering her body.

Her body tingled, jade eyes scrapping down exposed skin, sharply hips, soft thighs. Lexa could almost remember the feel of them wrapped around her hips, tightening every time she pushed forward. How smooth the skin of her neck was under her lips. The way she mewled out into the room.

 _ **“Dammit. You’re not supposed to do this. No connections. No feelings. In and out. Done. Don’t get attached,”**_ Lexa chided herself mentally.

She couldn’t get her mind to comprehend just what had come over her last night and lead her into one hell of a sweaty night with a woman who hated her guts. She scoffed a bit as she remembered her shitty excuse of being drunk. That got her nothing but an angrier Clarke. She clearly hadn’t thought about Clarke remembering just how many drinks she had and calling her out on it. Or perhaps it was the only excuse that she could come up with fast enough because she wasn’t about to tell the blonde her real reason of not wanting to get involved with her.

Lexa sighed for what felt like the millionth time that morning. Brain muddled and tired, eyes still unconsciously keeping watch over Clarke’s apartment, Lexa wondered just why she accepted the job in the first place.

* * *

**_Two weeks ago…_ **

_Lexa sat casually in one of the leather chairs in the lobby. A large receptionist desk sat to her right, the worker behind it typing away at her computer. Slender fingers pulled her phone from her pocket to take a look at the time._

_12:47 p.m._

_Her employer was late. No call or email._

_Surely she had the right time and place. She strived for perfection, no excuses._

_As the clock on her screen changed to one o’clock Lexa was preparing herself to leave before a man and a woman, both old enough to be her parents, approached her._

_“Ms. Woods, I’m so sorry we’re late. Work isn’t all that easy to get out of when things run a little late. I’m sorry if it’s caused you any inconveniences and I understand if you’re required to be some place else at the moment,” The man said apologetically._

_Lexa had fully stood from her seat while he talked so now she hovered in front of him,“It’s quite alright, Mr. Griffin. I know working for the military and then your wife being head surgeon sometimes calls for a few delays in your schedule.”_

_“Please, call me Jake. And this is Abby.”_

_The couple quickly shook hands with her before Jake gestured for them to begin walking towards one of the smaller conference rooms that he had booked for them to use. The air around them was silent as they stepped into the room. A man that had been standing outside the door followed them inside, closing the door behind them, and took post in front of it._

_“Take a seat and we can begin. Since we’re running late we’ll keep this as short as possible,” Jake produced a small picture from his pocket and slid it across the table in front of her,“This is my daughter, Clarke. I want you to keep and eye on her. Watch over her but without her knowing.”_

_Lexa slowly picked up the glossy photo and let her eyes scan over the image. A blonde with a dazzling smile, pearly white teeth peeking out from behind pink lips, stared back at her. Her heart thumped hardly in her chest as she locked onto the ocean depths that laid in her eyes. This was easily the most gorgeous woman that she had seen. And she was pretty sure the picture didn’t do any justice to seeing her in person._

_But she still had questions. It wasn’t like she would just accept the job because the woman was pretty._

_Well…more than pretty._

_“May I ask why? Is there someone after her? Is she in danger? Or is this just extra protection?” Lexa asked cautiously as she sat the picture back down._

_Abby cleared her throat before speaking for the first time since they met,“My husband’s job had come with a few…undesired issues. We both thought it would be best if our daughter had a little more protection until they can be solved.”_

_“And these issues are…?”_

_“Classified. If it becomes dire for you to fully know about these issues to keep Clarke safe then we will tell you. But for now it is to stay between me, my wife, and the U.S Military,” Jake said seriously._   
_Lexa nodded slowly,“Okay. My next question…why secretly? Why not post me as her bodyguard like most do?”_

_Jake chuckled deeply,“When you meet Clarke you’ll begin to understand. She’s head strong and stubborn. Like her mother here. And she doesn’t take to kindly to people thinking that she can’t handle herself. So therefore, keeping your position a secret from her will save you a lot more trouble in the long run. Trust me.”_

_Lexa restrained herself from cocking an eyebrow as if to say ‘are you serious’. Judging by her picture, Clarke didn’t look like someone who caused a lot of trouble for someone. Then again, her mother once told her not to judge a book by its cover…and there was also a little glimmer of **something** in Clarke’s eyes. Something she couldn’t quite place. This was either going to be very interesting or a waste of her time._

_“So I’m just to keep an eye on her from a distance? Or would you prefer if I became a sort of acquaintance of her’s?”_

_She wasn’t really sure if ‘friend’ was the right word to use in this situation._

_“Becoming friends with her wouldn’t hurt,” Abby chimed in,“Clarke is an open heart. She’s accepting of everyone and will be easy to make friends with. It will also help to keep you closer to her. The closer the better. We’ve also began renting out the apartment across from her. If you are to accept the job then you will be moved into it. A sort of ruse if you will. It will also make it easier so that if someone were to break into her apartment you’re right there across the hall.”_

_Jake nodded along with his wife, backing up her information and ideas. She looked between the two for a moment before letting her eyes drift down to the photo resting in front of her. Pale skin and blonde hair filled her vision as she contemplated the offer in her head._

_Breathing deeply Lexa surveyed the couple ahead of her,“I will need a bit more information from you both, but I have no qualms about accepting the job.”_

_Jake and Abby both smiled happily, obviously happy with her choice._

_“Of course. Whatever information you need we will get. If there is anything else you require for the job let us know and we will provide it for you,”Jake said happily,“Oh, and there is one more thing. There will be a camera installed into Clarke’s apartment, that way you are able to monitor what occurs inside. Call it a helping hand in keeping her safe. You’ll be able to see any and every person who walks into that apartment as well as being able to watch over her while she’s at home. The camera will offer a live feed as well as store all recordings into the computer we will provide you with as well as a highly secured program that we will have installed on your phone. The folder and program will have a password that, besides my wife and myself, only you will know.”_

_“With all due respect, Jake, I don’t find a camera necessary. I will be able to keep Clarke safe without it.”_

_“It is something that is nonnegotiable for Abby and I. If something were to happen or someone was to break in while Clarke was gone or, god forbid, still home we want it to be able to find out what happened and who caused it.”_

_Obviously Clarke’s parents weren’t too worried about what the camera might record their daughter doing. Whether it be lazing around naked, dancing around like a fool, or…entertaining company._

_“Of course. I understand then,” Lexa nodded respectfully._

_Jake took a look at the watch on his wrist before glancing back up at Lexa,“I think that’s all we will be able to discuss today, Lexa. I will have my assistant pull up the necessary paperwork and have it sent to you to review and sign. If you have any issues with it you can contact me through my assistant. You may also contact her with a list of the things you will be needing.”_

_“Yes, sir. I will be sure to have that ready as soon as possible.”_

_Abby and Jake both rose from their chairs, Lexa following closely behind and rounding the table. Jake held out his hand and the brunette grasped it firmly._

_“Thank you, Lexa. I have no doubt with your reputation that you will be able to protect our daughter from anything. With all the paperwork and preparing everything else we should be able to get you settled into the apartment in about two weeks. Until then I’ll get you all the information you’ll need on Clarke so you can brush up on that. She’s quite the character,” Jake winked._

_Lexa let a small controlled smile play over her lips as she released his hand. Abby held her own hand out and she quickly shook it before letting her hand fall back at her side._

_“We’ll be back in contact with you in a few days and will schedule another meeting with you before you get into the apartment. We’ll go over your contract and payment for the job,” Jake commented as the couple made their way towards the door,“I hope the rest of your day is wonderful, Lexa. We’ll be in touch.”_

_And with a wave of his hand they were gone, the man standing at the door disappearing with them. Lexa’s shoulder’s slumped and she sighed deeply as she let her professional mask fall away. She knew this was going to be a long job and was ready to just let her mind and body rest for the few days that she had on her own before starting._

_As her eyes swept across the empty room Lexa caught sight of Clarke’s picture still laying on the wooden table._

_“Damn. He forgot it,” Lexa mumbled to herself as she picked up the picture._

_Her thumb rubbed along the corner of the picture as she held it and stared. That glimmer from earlier reappearing in those blue eyes and pulling her in._

_This was definitely going to be an interesting job._

* * *

She’d learned everything she needed to about the blonde after that. From her class schedule right down to the tiny corner cafe that she frequented every Tuesday morning. And it had taken her a while to learn the list of names of her closets friends. Though she wouldn’t admit to anyone that she was a little surprised by the number of them when she pulled out the document. After a few more days of reviewing the information and her contract Jake’s assistant had contacted her to set another meeting.

Lexa had finally been able to part with Clarke’s picture during the meeting when she returned it to the older man. She was relieved to see it go, having spent more than one time finding herself staring at it as she studied Clarke’s life. But another part of her was also sad to see it go…though she wouldn’t admit it to herself or anyone else for that matter.

The second meeting had been short and to the point much like the first one. A few issues were worked out with her contract and they reviewed the necessary list of supplies she would need for the job. It was only a week later that she found herself carrying her boxes up into the apartment across from Clarke’s. She knew that Clarke normally went to a study group around the time that she began moving in so she was quick to try and get everything into the apartment before the blonde arrived back home. Her father had stressed more than once about how nosy Clarke could be when she got curious about something.

And the last this she needed was Clarke finding the box filled with all of her own personal information.

And maybe a registered gun.

The last thing she had been expecting though was for said blonde to come waltzing in and literally running right into her. And it didn’t help that she let her mouth run, filled with anger, as she yelled at her. Even though she didn’t know it was her at first. But after meeting those crystal blue eyes she knew that she was right when she thought the picture did her no justice. But her beauty didn’t help get Clarke back on her good side. It didn’t stop them from basically having a screaming match in the hallway or stop Lexa from teasing the girl. She might as well have some fun with it.

As her eyes were still trained on the computer as she thought, her pupils almost blew out as Clarke stretched and strut her way across her apartment. Still naked as the day she was born. All the thoughts of the previous two weeks vanished as she watched pale skin disappear into the bedroom. She could feel the dull ache between her thighs flare up as she once again remembered what Clarke’s skin felt like against her’s. Could almost hear the moans reverberating through her ears as they had last night.

Lexa slouched down into her chair, hands covering her face as she groaned.

_This was definitely going to be one hell of a job._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to say a big thank you to everyone who has left kudos, commented, and subscribed!! You all are amazingly awesome!! If you'd like you can find me on tumblr @clexa-15 and feel free to send me messages or asks! I love hearing from my readers and try to respond as quickly as possible! If there's something specific you'd like to read here or on any of my other stories just leave an ask and I'll see what I can do! :)
> 
> Until next time Lovelies! 
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> xoxo


	3. Something's Starting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two days pass. Clarke visits her favorite cafe. Someone saves the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this may not be as big a slow burn as I thought. ;) There's some pretty good details in here today and I hope you all like it. A few things happen in this chapter that'll start putting us into the direction of our plot and I'm really excited to start diving into it!
> 
> And sorry for the long wait! I've had a few things happen here at home that have needed my attention! 
> 
> WARNING: MENTION OF ATTEMPTED RAPE.

_Two days._

Two days since Clarke ran into Lexa.

Two days since she’d brought her back to her apartment and had one of the best orgasms of her life. Not that she would admit that to the brunette.

Clarke, thankfully, hadn’t seen Lexa since slamming the door in her face and leaving her in the hallway with a strap-on. She’d heard the telltale sound of her apartment door opening and closing, but other than that the brunette was seemingly nonexistent. And the fact that Clarke constantly checked the hallways before turning a corner helped her avoid Lexa even further.

But still…there was that feeling in the pit of her stomach. The one that she felt when Lexa’s lips glided across her own. The spark that sent tingles down her spine as Lexa brought her to oblivion. There was something about that feeling. Something she couldn’t shake. Despite how much she didn’t want to see Lexa, her body betrayed her, calling for the brunette.

Clarke huffed and trudged further down the sidewalk, pulling her raincoat closer to her body to keep the drizzle from soaking her clothes. Her morning class had finally run on time for once and she thanked the gods for her teacher arriving on time today. She had just enough time to grab a quick lunch and relax a little before heading to her last class of the day.

Her eyes sparkled happily as she eyed the little corner cafe, The Ark, that had become her favorite place in the city. It was the perfect walking distance from her apartment and the school campus. And they served the best breakfast panini she had ever tasted. She had stumbled upon the cafe during her first semester of med school and it had become a god-send. All the workers knew her by name and always had her regular Tuesday order waiting for her at the counter.

The little bell above the door jingled, signaling her entrance to the quaint shop. An onyx haired woman stood behind the counter, handing a gentleman his coffee, and her eyes locked onto Clarke the second she walked in.

“Clarke! How’s it going?”

The man brushed past Clarke as she made her way towards the counter and the hairs on the back of her neck rose. She watched him walk out the door for a second before turning back to the barista with a wide grin.

“It’s going good, Maya. My morning class finally ran on time today and I have enough time to enjoy my lunch here instead of the gross cafeteria,” Clarke commented as she removed her dripping jacket.

“So the usual then?”

Clarke nodded even though Maya already began moving around preparing her order. She waited patiently at the counter for her drink and food taking a quick look around the shop to see that it was empty save for herself and Maya. She eyed the little table nestled in the back corner by the large window and was glad that no one occupied her usual table.

Today was turning out to be a good day, well except for the rain.

“Here you go,” Maya said as she placed a tray with Clarke’s food on the counter,“Breakfast panini and coffee with sugar and cream.”

Clarke handed over her money, telling Maya to keep the change. Eyes on her food and stomach rumbling, she paid no mind to the bell above the cafe door sounding at the entrance of another customer. She barely registered the sound of Maya greeting the customer as she picked up her tray and spun around to head to her table.

“Clarke, look out!”

Maya’s words registered in her head too late. As she spun around her tray bumped into the chest of the person that she didn’t realize had walked up behind her. She stumbled back a bit, her cup tipping over and painting the front of her white shirt with steaming coffee. Hands shot out and grabbed onto her elbows to steady her before she could tumble backwards any further.

_Those hands._

They felt all too familiar and Clarke was silently cursing herself as she forced her eyes upwards.

Lexa’s face, shocked and with a hint of amusement, filled her vision.

“Seriously?” Clarke huffed,“Now, my good day has just been ruined.”

The brunette gave her a deadpanned expression,“Not my fault you weren’t watching where you were going. _Again_.”

“You little—,” Clarke stopped herself, taking in deep breathes to try and calm her hastily rising anger,“You know what? Never mind. I’m just going to pretend like you aren’t here. But after you pay for my drink.”

Lexa snorted and moved around Clarke so she could lean against the counter,“Why would I pay for a drink that _you_ spilled?”

Clarke could see Maya watching them with interest as she slowly wiped down the counter, trying to make it seem like she was just working. She rolled her eyes when she realized that the woman would want full details on just _who_ she was arguing with and _why_.

“Because, if you wouldn’t have been standing so close behind me then I wouldn’t have bumped into you and spilled my coffee!” Clarke said as she pointed to her ruined shirt.

She could see Lexa’s eyes scrap down the front of her chest, eyes darkening as they lingered on her chest. Lexa looked over her shoulder as the entrance bell jingled once more and Clarke peeked around her shoulder to see a few frat boys make their way inside. The blonde watched as Lexa’s jaw clenched before she turned back around and moved closer to her.

“Come with me,” Lexa said as she pulled the tray from Clarke’s hands and sat it on the counter.

Clarke stuttered as the older woman began pulling her towards the back of the cafe,“Where the hell are you taking me? What about my food?”

“You’ve got bigger problems than your food, Clarke.”

“What are you talking about? What is more important than me getting food in my stomach so I have enough energy to last me the rest of the day?” Clarke asked as Lexa pulled a door open and began pushing her inside.

It took a few seconds for her to realize that Lexa had moved them into the bathroom. The door fell shut behind them and she felt that she might suffocate in the small space filled with only her and Lexa.

“This is your bigger problem,” Lexa bit out as she spun her around to face the mirror above the sink.

Her reflection stared back at her. Blonde hair pulled up in a messy bun, blue eyes shimmering in the florescent lighting, Lexa’s hands still on her shoulders, and…

 _Oh_.

Her white shirt clung to her like a second skin, completely soaked in coffee. Her black bra, once only slightly visible, was now on full display for everyone to see. Her cheeks burned as she met Lexa’s eyes in the mirror and realized that she had been giving the woman a show that she probably enjoyed more than she was willing to admit. They stayed locked in a gaze for a little longer than normal, only breaking apart as Lexa cleared her throat awkwardly.

“Here. Take this.”

Clarke turned around and watched as Lexa shrugged out of her jacket before pulling her black t-shirt above her head. Blue eyes tore away from the brunette despite the fact that she still wore a dark cami underneath the t-shirt.

 _ **“Holy shit. I can see the outline of her abs. No! Bad Clarke. You’re supposed to be angry with her!”**_ Clarke mentally scolded herself.

She felt the slightest tap on her arm and peaked carefully over her shoulder to see Lexa holding the shirt out to her,“Hold this. At least let me make sure you aren’t burned too bad.”

Just the thought of Lexa pulling up her shirt and checking over her skin had her body lighting on fire. It wasn’t until then that she noticed the dull burn across her chest and upper abdomen. She hissed a little, pulling gently at her rapidly cooling shirt to try and ease a little of the pain.

Hands reached for the hem of her shirt.

“Up,” Lexa commanded as she began lifting the shirt.

Clarke slowly lifted her arms, her mind trying to figure out just how she ended up shedding her clothes in The Ark’s bathroom with the one woman that she couldn’t stand. She shivered a bit as the ac vent blew a cool waft of air onto her causing goosebumps to break out along her skin. The blonde jumped as she felt fingers prod at the sensitive skin around her chest and looked down to meet Lexa’s slightly concerned eyes.

“I’ll be fine,” Clarke said as she quickly looked over her own chest,“Nothing a few cold compresses won’t help.”

Figuring she wasn’t going to get anything more, Lexa backed away from her. Clarke gazed at her for a moment before tugging the borrowed shirt over her head. She caught a light whiff of the brunette’s perfume and tried to subtly breath it in a little deeper. No one would deny that Lexa smelled damn good. Although, Clarke wouldn’t admit that to her. Of course not.

“Thank you. For the shirt. You didn’t have to,” Clarke mumbled.

Lexa slipped her jacket back over her shoulders and zipped it up half way as she chanced a glance at Clarke,“God knows what those frat boys would have said had they seen you like that.”

Clarke’s eyebrows shot up, blue eyes widening at the words. Was Lexa…jealous? The tone of her voice gave her the feeling that Lexa didn’t want anyone seeing her in the position she was just in, let alone some pushy frat boys. A little smirk played over the blonde’s lips at the new discovery.

Despite still being upset with Lexa…maybe she could have a little fun with her.

“What? Are you jealous? Of some frat boys?” Clarke responded cooly.

Jade eyes sent a glare her way,“I’m not nor will I ever be jealous, Clarke. There’s nothing between us for me to be jealous about.”

A barley noticeable huff left Clarke’s lungs as she realized she would just have to work a little harder to rile up the woman. She slowly inched her way forward, keeping her eyes locked with Lexa’s as she advance forward.

“So you’re saying if I stayed in that shirt and they started ogling me, that you wouldn’t get all angry and possessive?”

Lexa pretended to think on it a little, her hand rubbing her chin for dramatics,“Possessive? No. Angry? Yes. No woman, or anyone else for that matter, should be ogled like they’re a piece of meat without feelings.”

Clarke continued to press forward and smirked even more when Lexa’s back met the wall of the bathroom,“I seem to remember you doing some ogling two nights ago in the club.”

The brunette, although backed against a wall, sized the shorter woman up as she stared down at her with heated eyes,“Ogling and appreciating are two different things, Clarke.”

“Appreciating? Is that what they're calling it now?” Clarke whispered as she pushed her body closer into Lexa’s.

Clarke wasn’t sure what had come over her. This was just supposed to be a little game. Something to rile Lexa’s feathers and put her on edge, but it seemed her plan was backfiring on herself. She could feel the growing ache between her legs with each passing second. It was supposed to be a little teasing and then just leaving the brunette high and dry…well maybe not dry. But the only thing she seemed to be doing was making herself hot and bothered.

She inhaled sharply, chewing on her bottom lip breathlessly as she tried to regain her senses.

But that didn’t help.

Everything was a blur until suddenly her back was against a wall, Lexa molding her body into her’s. Her hands were held tightly above her head restricting her movements and sending another jolt down to her core. Plump lips traced her jaw and stopped just below her ear to nudge at the soft skin.

“I know what you’re doing, Clarke. You’re just trying to see how far you can push me and then just leave me here wanting,” Lexa husked into her ear,“It’s not going to work.”

Clarke arched her back away from the wall pushing her chest into Lexa’s,“Are you sure? Because it looks like I’ve got you right where I want you.”

There was a soft growl in her ear before lips were suddenly claiming her’s. The moan that escaped her mouth was nothing but sinful. It reverberated off the walls and echoed around them and threw her body into a sort of frenzy. Clarke tugged at her hands, desperately wanting to feel _something_ under them, but to no avail. Lexa didn’t let up her grip as she stole the very breath from Clarke’s lungs.

And she left her gasping as she felt warm fingers slid beneath the waistband of her pants. Deft fingers skimmed the lace of her panties lightly pushing at the sensitive bundle of nerves that was hidden within. Clarke’s head flew back against the wall as Lexa’s fingers pushed against her opening through her underwear, a low moan forming on her lips.

And just as fast as she had her pinned to the wall, Lexa was gone.

Clarke stumbled forward a little bit, surprised by the sudden disappearance of Lexa’s body. Her chest heaved as she tried to pull in enough oxygen through swollen lips. Blue eyes locked on a smirking Lexa as she made her way towards the bathroom room door.

“Two can play at your little game, Clarke,” Lexa called over her shoulder before slipping out.

The blonde was left breathless and needy against the bathroom wall. Her mouth hung open, her mind trying to figure out just when Lexa had caught on to her little game and turned the tables on her. Her fingers ran across the cotton fabric of the brunette’s shirt and couldn’t help but sniff lightly at the collar once more. Lexa was beginning to intoxicate her, making her brain a muddled mess and incapable of much thought.

Her original plan, of leaving Lexa high and dry, turned to nothing the second her lips were on her’s.

Clarke sighed heavily and let her head drop back against the brick wall with a thud.

_“Fuck.”_

* * *

After making herself as decent as possible Clarke made her way back out into the thankfully empty cafe. Lexa was no where to be seen and that took a little weight off her chest. Maya leaned on the counter near her tray of food with a curious smirk on her face. Clarke trudged over to the woman and sent a glare her way when she heard her giggling.

“What was that all about?”

Clarke huffed loudly,“Nothing. Just my new neighbor that I can’t stand.”

“Can’t stand?” Maya asked smugly,“I’m supposed to believe that after seeing her walk out that door with kiss swollen lips and messy hair? And not to mention that I'm pretty sure that's her shirt that you're wearing.”

“It’s complicated,” Clarke said with a deep blush.

“Sure it is.”

The blonde checked her watch and cringed at the time,“Can you just bag this for me? I’m not going to have time to eat it here. Maybe if I run fast enough I can eat it before class starts.”

“Yeah, I got you. But don’t think that I’m going to just forget about this. I want all the details the next time you come in,” Maya said pointedly as she bagged the food.

Clarke rolled her eyes,“Fine. Next time. I have to go now though or otherwise I’ll be late.”

“Go,” Maya said with a soft smile as she handed over the bag,“Study hard so you can go save lives someday. I might need you to be my surgeon sometime in the near future.”

“I hope not,” Clarke called back as she made her way to the exit.

Maya was one person she never wanted to see on her operating table. Ever.

Clarke took a glance out the glass door and noticed the rain still pouring down only a little heavier than earlier. With a low groan she tugged on her jacket and pulled the hood up before stepping outside. A few curses fell from her lips as she questioned why she decided to walk on a day like today.

“It’s not going to rain that much, Clarke. You’ll be fine walking today, just take a rain coat,” The blonde mumbled to herself as she made her way down the empty sidewalk,“Why do I listen to myself?”

She could feel the droplets of rain soaking her pants and shoes as she tried to rush as fast as possible back to campus. Clarke knew that she was probably going to get an ear full about trailing water into her professor’s classroom, not that she could help it any. She was, however, thankful that her - _Lexa’s_ \- shirt was safe and dry under her raincoat. Not to mention warm.

Clarke had internally shivered when the brunette had slipped the shirt onto her. Lexa’s warmth had seeped into the fabric and enveloped her, almost like a hug. Almost like she could feel Lexa’s ams around her again.

 _ **“No, Clarke. You’re supposed to be mad at her. No more thinking about her arms,”**_ Clarke mentally scolded herself.

The loud booming of thunder startled out of her thoughts and had her suddenly yelping and dropping the plastic bag in her hands. The bag splashed with a wet ‘plop’ onto the concrete slab below her feet, splashing even more water onto her soaked shoes. Clarke rolled her eyes at her clumsiness and began to bend down to pick up her food. Just as her hands skimmed along the plastic the hairs on the back of her neck stood up.

And it was already to late for her to cry out as a hand covered her mouth and she was pulled into an alleyway.

Whoever held her slammed her back into the wall, momentarily disorienting her, and pushed their body up against her’s. She struggled against them, muffled yells sounding against the hand over her mouth, but they kept a firm grip. In her struggle her hood had fallen back and her eyes were now overrun by falling droplets. The rain blurred her vision and the most she could tell of the person holding her was that they were male and had black hair.

_The man from the coffee shop._

“The more you struggle the worse it’ll be,” The man husked in front of her.

Clarke shivered and her stomach rolled as she thought of what this man possibly wanted to do with her. That alone caused her to thrash around even more. The pounding rain around them drowned out her near silent screams and she feared no one would ever hear her.

Suddenly a sharp point was pressed against her cheek, the biting cold metal of a blade something she wished she never had to face.

“Now, now, just calm down. I wouldn’t want to have to hurt this pretty face of your’s,” The man chuckled as he ran the blade along her jaw.

Hot tears poured down her cheeks, washed away by the rain, but still there nonetheless. This was how she was going to die? Held against a brick wall in an alley with some thug trying to do god knows what to her? What would happen when her body was discovered by police? When her parents were told the news? Raven?

_Lexa?_

Clarke was startled by the sudden thought of the brunette. Why, out of all the people she knew, did she think of her? Someone she was angry with. Who stirred up every emotion she could without even trying? They had only had one night together, and Lexa had entitled it as a ‘mistake’ and Clarke hated her for it, and yet…she still thought about her. Why? She wasn’t sure.

For a moment, one sweet moment, she had slipped away from the situation she was currently facing. But she was drawn back into it when she felt grimy hands pulling at the zipper of her coat. She fought back against the man, her screams renewed and a little louder than before.

“Shut the fuck up or else your body will be on the afternoon news,” The man growled as he pushed the blade harder against her cheek.

She felt the sting where it pierced her flesh. Felt the hot blood bead against her cold skin.

_This was it._

Watery blue eyes became hidden behind scrunched eyelids. Images of her life, happy and carefree, filled her mind as she waited for the worst to happen.

_Her parents._

A hand began trailing down towards her pants.

_Raven, Harper, Maya._

The button on her jeans was popped open.

_Those green eyes and that stupid smirk._

And just when Clarke was ready to detach herself from her body, the man was gone. She fell forward, falling to the ground and barely managing to catch herself before she hit the ground. Her breath came out in heavy pants and she only now realized that she had been holding her breath. She tried to calm her racing nerves but there was no use. Her head was light, her vision blurry and not just because of the rain anymore.

“Clarke!”

Suddenly there were hands on her arms. She jerked back fearing that the man had returned and remembered her name from when Maya called out to her in the shop. She thrashed around, shouting and throwing her balled up fists as hard as she could at the body in front of her, eyes shut tightly.

“Clarke! Calm down! It’s me! It’s Lexa! It’s over!”

Blue eyes snapped open and met wild green. Lexa’s features swam around her still somewhat blurry vision and she couldn't help the stutter of her heart when she noticed the concern etched into them. Small wrinkles creased between the brunette’s brows as she studied Clarke. Her hands were held out between them, palm out, to show her that she meant no harm.

“Lexa,” Clarke breathed out.

She didn’t hold back. The fear from what had almost occurred sent her flying into Lexa’s arms. Clarke pressed herself tightly against Lexa’s strong frame and buried her hands into the wet fabric of her jacket. She could feel the brunette tense beneath her before she relaxed and wrapped her arms around her. That same warmth that she had felt with Lexa’s shirt was now radiating off the brunette herself. This was stronger thought. More real and alive beneath her, a chest rising and falling as she was pulled tighter into it.

In the distance, Clarke could hear police sirens racing towards them. She didn’t know how but she knew that Lexa had called them and her body’s tension eased up just a bit at the thought.

“It’s over, Clarke. It’s going to be okay,” Lexa whispered into her hair as she cradled her tightly.

And she knew it was, but there was _something else_ that was starting. Something that was beginning to settle deep in her gut and fluttered every time she caught that hint of vast green and that strong jawline.

_Something else was definitely beginning._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhhhh, I hoped you all liked this one! Next chapter we'll go into a little detail on what happened and Lexa's 'story' on how she found Clarke! 
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies!
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> And a big thanks to everyone who has left kudos and comments! Every single one is appreciated!! :)
> 
> Xoxo


	4. Live For Me, Promise Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Incident aftermath. A little flashback of sorts. A hidden story beginning to unfold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to say I'm really pleased with this chapter. It jumps around a bit, and I'm gonna say now, both Lexa and Clarke's emotions are all over the place. They can't seem to figure out what they want. lol. Anyway, I'm super excited for you all to read this. You'll get a really good bit of something at the end. 
> 
> And please, disregard Clarke's behavior. Like I said, emotions are all over the place, and I swear she won't be acting like she is through the entire story. 
> 
> ;)

Jade eyes peered around the scene in front of her.

It wasn’t too much longer before her and Clarke were being lead out of the alleyway, the rain now only a slight mist atop their heads. Blue lights flashed off of building windows which held the curious and wondering eyes of anyone looking to catch a glimpse of whatever incident they thought had occurred. She could hear a few officers shouting for an EMT to assist the man still lying in the alleyway groaning through blood and broken teeth.

It took everything in her for Lexa to remove her arms from around Clarke as another female EMT asked to look her over. Blue eyes held her’s in slight panic as she felt the warm and safe arms falling away from her.

“You’re going to be okay, Clarke. No one’s going to hurt you,” Lexa spoke softly.

Something seemed to click into place in those baby blues,“Uh, yeah. You’re right. I’m sorry.”

Before she could tell Clarke that she had nothing to be sorry for the EMT was already leading her away so she could take care of any wounds. She kept a close eye on the blonde as she took a seat on the edge of the bus and was wrapped in a thick wool blanket by the woman. Her mind began wondering as Clarke was carefully looked over.

What happened if she hadn’t been there?

The extent of damage the disgusting man would have done to Clarke had she not stopped him?

Lexa shivered violently where she stood and not because of the rain that soaked through her clothing. After one more quick glance to assure herself that Clarke was still fine the brunette’s gaze was casted down to her hands. Her knuckles were split open, bruises beginning to form around them from the brut of her punches. Her ribs throbbed painfully from where the man had got a good punch in himself. She could also feel the drying blood caked over the split on her lip from where the man’s head cracked against her’s forcefully, thankful, although, that he had horrible aim.

“You need someone to check you over?”

She quickly dropped her hands and stared up at the officer that had addressed her. The man was tall, muscular in build with a head full of slightly graying hair hidden underneath an officer’s hat. His eyes were that of a gentle but disciplined soul as he took in Lexa’s stiff posture and beaten hands.

“No, um, thank you though. I’ll be okay.”

“It was brave of you to do that for her, you know. You really saved her back there,” The man said evenly as he pulled out a pen and small notepad,“My name is officer Kane. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions about what happened?”

She glanced up at Clarke and noticed her also talking with an officer as the EMT took her vitals. Blue eyes drifted to her’s for the slightest of moments before she tore away her gaze and shifted it back to the officer before her.

The brunette held out a hand in a polite gesture and nodded curtly as Kane accepted it,“Lexa Woods. Ask away.”

Kane ran her through a series of routine questions. What happened? How did you come by the scene of the crime? What occurred between point A and point B. So on and so fourth. By the time she answered the last question a gurney carrying Clarke’s assailant passed behind Kane. Lexa’s furious eyes stayed trained on the now unconscious man, nostrils flared and lips in a tight line as she reigned in her anger.

The officer glanced behind him for a moment before turning back to her with wide eyes,“You did quite the number on him.”

“Well, he would have—,” Lexa’s words broke off, unable to finish the vile sentence.

Her throat felt constricted as imaginary sounds of Clarke calling out for help filled her ears. Her vision swam with pained blue eyes and blood matted blood curls, a weak hand held out to her for help. Dark lashes fluttered quickly to remove the vision from her green eyes as she felt the bile begin to rise in her throat. Lexa took a calming breath before searching for Clarke through the crowd once again. The rumbling unease in her stomach settled a bit as she saw the blonde smiling thankfully at the EMT.

“Is that all?” Lexa questioned hastily, cutting off whatever nonsense Kane had been discussing with. Not that she was listening.

“Uh, yes. I’ve got your information here should anything else arise. Thank you for your time, Ms. Woods.”

She didn’t even care that she couldn’t remember giving her information to Kane. The only thing that seemed to matter right now was feeling Clarke’s unmarked flesh under her palms once more. Feeling the warm puffs of breath against her neck as she held her close in comfort. Seeing those eyes gazing at her with such…

Lexa stopped short in her trek towards Clarke. One that she wasn’t even aware that she had started.

_No._

She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t feel this way about anyone. Not again. Not after…

She couldn’t. She wouldn’t. She _won’t_.

It took everything for her to steal her features, to wipe the worry that was laden within her eyes. Took everything to rotate the tension from her shoulders and restart a steady, unhurried trek to the blonde. Lexa quelled the racing of her heart seeing Clarke sitting on the edge of the bus, blanket wrapped around her and wet brassy hair clinging to her paler-than-usual skin. By time she reached her, hands clasped in front of her to keep from reaching out to her, the EMT was done with her routine check and was repacking any supplies she had used.

“Hey.”

The words were soft, a bare whisper on the wind but, in truth, they were a tidal wave in Lexa’s ears. The raspiness that clung to the edge of Clarke’s voice sent chills down her spine.

_She couldn’t do this._

When Lexa stayed unknowingly silent the blonde continued,“I w-wanted to say thank you…for what you did, Lexa.”

The brunette suddenly snapped out of the waging war inside her head, or was it her heart?

“Don’t, Clarke,” Lexa pressed as she took a tiny step closer,“I would never just walk away from something like that happening to someone. I would have done it for anyone.”

“Right,” Clarke said with a forced chuckle, not one of amusement,“I, uh, I’m gonna go.”

Lexa watched, confused, as the blonde stood from her seat on the bus and dropped the blanket inside and throwing out a ‘thanks’ to the EMT.

“Clarke, wait,” The brunette called as Clarke tried to walk away from her.

“What, Lexa? What could you possibly want?”

The anger was a surprise. She expected tears, clinging fingers on her shirt like they had been minutes ago. But not this. Not the fire hot gaze that bore into her very being.

“Why are you upset? What did I say?”

“Really? Did you not hear yourself speaking moments ago? What you said to me?”

_I would have done it for anyone._

Oh.

Lexa cringed as she heard the words echo in her head. To Clarke, the words must have insinuated that she didn’t necessarily care that it was her that she rescued. That she wouldn’t have went out of her way just to save the blonde.

If only she knew…the extent that her feelings were rising to. The feelings that she would no longer allow to grow.

_Not again._

“I didn’t mean it like that and you know it,” Lexa sighed.

A bitter laugh escaped the blonde’s lips,“Then what did it mean? That you actually _cared_ enough to step in because it was me and not some other person? And that can’t be it because last time I checked you didn’t _care_ enough to even think that what happened the other night might have been something more.”

“Clarke, I—.”

“No,” Clarke abruptly cut her off shaking her head,“I can’t. Not today. I can’t be around you right now. Thank you for saving me, honestly, but I think it’d be best if we just stay away from each other.”

And just like that the blonde was gone. A fleeting image of wet hair, watery eyes, and a bandaged cheek disappearing through all the cops and bystanders. She knew it was her job to follow her, to keep her safe, but her legs were filled with lead. Grounding her to her spot on the wet pavement as officers buzzed around her gathering evidence of the attempted crime. Her gaze locked down onto her hands and only then, as a flash of Clarke’s bandaged cheek rushed through her mind, did she realize that the small amount of blood smeared on her right hand wasn’t her’s or the man’s.

_Blood._

_So much blood._

_Hands shaking, clutching at the pouring wound._

_No. This can’t be happening._

_It wasn’t supposed to be like this._

_“You did this. It’s because of you that they’re dead — that she’s dead. Because you let your emotions distract you.”_

_**Love is weakness. Love makes you blind.** _

The sound of the ambulance’s door snapping shut pulled Lexa from her thoughts. Her chest heaved with a shaky breath and she looked skyward in an attempt to stop the swell of salty liquid in her eyes. It had been a while since that fated night had entered her mind. And it wasn’t something she was looking to bring back up again. Not for a while.

With a deep sigh, Lexa figured there was nothing more for her here and it was time for her to head home. Before she could even take a step in the direction of her apartment her name was being called through the crowd.

“Ms. Woods! Please, wait!” Officer Kane called as her jogged lightly up to her.

Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose,“I’ve already answered all of your questions, Officer. I’d really just like to go home now.”

“No more questions, I swear. I was actually wondering if you would be seeing Clarke anytime soon. We found it in the alleyway. I figured it was her’s.”

Lexa’s head tilted slightly as Kane held up a delicate little chain. A spherical charm, beautifully detailed to depict the Earth in all its glory, dangled at the end. She could hazily remember the necklace moving in time with the heavy chest that laid under her. Could remember her lips brushing past it as she trailed down pale skin.

“Um, yeah. I’m pretty sure that’s Clarke’s. I can get it back to her,” Lexa replied robotically, mind still reeling from the images of the blonde.

Kane gently laid the necklace in her upturned palm before bidding her farewell. She barely registered him walking away and beginning to order everyone to start clearing out, her eyes still locked on the charm. The continents were a shiny silver, something she found a little strange, but the rest was colored a beautiful shimmery blue. One that rivaled the eyes that had been staring at her with something so fierce not too long ago.

Lexa swallowed past the lump in her throat, knowing that she would have to return the necklace to Clarke. If the blonde found out that she had it and didn't return it to her as soon as possible there was a great chance that her anger towards Lexa would only rise. It had to be something important to her, seeing as to how every time Lexa recalled looking anywhere near the blonde’s chest her brain had subconsciously registered that the necklace laid against her skin. She just never really paid attention to it until now.

With the tension once again creeping it’s way up her neck, Lexa began her walk back towards home. The necklace dangled delicately from her clenched fingers. The charm rocked back and forth, almost resembling Lexa’s own rocking emotions.

* * *

She had been standing there way too long. Longer than she would ever admit to anyone. Hand poised above the door ready to send a swift knock into the wood. But overtime she willed her hand to move it was like some unseen force was holding it back. Her palms were sweaty, the necklace almost slipping from her grasp more than once. Her mind raced with what she would possibly say once Clarke opened the door.

“God, I’m an idiot. I can’t even knock on her door and return a silly necklace,” Lexa mumbled to herself as she let her hand drop to her side.

And she stood there. Still staring at the wooden door that separated her and Clarke’s apartment. Memories of her pushing the blonde against that very door as she tried to unlock it danced behind her eyes. Almost taunting her with moans that filled her ears.

“Lexa?”

Emerald eyes turned to the sound of her name, locking onto confused blue. Clarke stood a few feet away from her, keys and what looked like take out in her hands. Her clothes were still a little damp, only an hour having gone by since the incident.

“What are you doing here? I thought I said i—,” Lexa quickly cut her off before she could continue.

“I know what you said. I just needed to give you something. I thought you were home already. That’s why I was standing here.”

She rambled nervously. She knew she did. But she couldn’t help it. The emotions that she tried to tame were beginning to rise against her better judgement and she suddenly wanted to be as far away from Clarke as possible. And the blonde seemed to want the same thing.

“Give me what?” Clarke questioned curiously, stepping just a hair closer.

Lexa, against her better judgement, stepped forward, closing most of the distance between them, and held out her fist for Clarke. The blonde’s eyes wondered to her hand before gazing back to her with questioning eyes. Tentatively Clarke maneuvered her keys into her other hand before holding it open under her’s. Lexa took the moment to examine Clarke’s face. She could see the wariness settling at the corners of her eyes, the slight creases on her forehead more noticeable. She knew that today’s events would take a tole on the woman before her but she didn’t expect to see the evidence playing across Clarke’s features so early on.

Quickly breaking away from Clarke’s face Lexa opened her hand enough to let the necklace drop from her palm, her fingers still gripping the chain. The Earth charm dangled helplessly above Clarke’s hand, barley brushing the skin, as the brunette awaited her reaction.

A gasp sounded from slightly chapped lips, hand moving away from the charm and brushing along her empty chest.

“Where did you get that? I never take it off! I didn’t even realize it was gone!”

Lexa averted her gaze as Clarke quickly grasped the necklace, their fingers brushing swiftly, sending a small spark between their meeting skin.

“One of the officers, Kane, found it in the alleyway. You must have lost it in the struggle. He asked if I could return it to you.”

Clarke’s eyes wondered over the jewelry, inspecting for any hidden damage it might have taken. Once satisfied, she lifted her gaze back to Lexa, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to find words.

“Um, t-thank you. I don’t know what I would have done without this,” Clarke whispered as she gripped the necklace tighter.

“It was nothing. Kane found it. I just wanted to make sure you got it back,” Lexa replied as she stuffed her hands into her pockets, posture stiffing in awkwardness.

It was like something had snapped back into place in Clarke. That she remembered her current feelings towards the brunette. One second she was staring at her with something Lexa would say was akin to gratitude before it quickly swapped to the anger from earlier. Clarke held her head high, pocketing the necklace as she looked Lexa over with a somewhat bored expression.

“Is that it?”

There was a slight pang in Lexa’s chest at the harshness in Clarke’s voice. She didn’t know why she felt it. Why it hurt her so much. This was what she wanted. What she needed. She couldn’t get attached to Clarke. She couldn’t let feelings get in the way. They only made things more complicated. It was best if Clarke thought they both hated each other. Although it was a completely different thing trying to convince herself of that.

“Yeah. That’s it,” Lexa said firmly.

Clarke didn’t pry any further. Instead, she simply stepped around the brunette and quickly unlock her door. Lexa stayed rooted to her spot as she listened to keys jingle and the door opening, followed quickly by it slamming shut. The sound reverberated in her chest. Pulling at her heart and making it pound against her ribs as something snapped within her.

Everything she felt, everything she remembered. Seeing Clarke’s beauty for the first time. Having her withering underneath her. Holding her close and comforting her in that alley. She pushed it away. Buried it deep and locked it away. Her face feel into an emotionless mask, eyes steeled over and no longer holding that little glimmer that began to resurface when green met blue for the first time.

Back ridged, Lexa turned and made her way into her apartment. Before the door swung completely shut she allowed herself one last lingering gaze at the apartment across the hall.

Nothing would make this any easier for her.

Not after this.

Not after Clarke.

* * *

_“Any visuals?”_

_Fuzzy static filled the ear piece of her comm as green eyes scanned the surrounding area outside the glass door. The few people behind her shuffled as silently as possible as they waited for her command._

_“All clear. No visuals of any hostiles,” A gruff voice filled her ear._

_Lexa peered behind her, taking in the honey colored eyes that lingered on her. With a swift nod the people began moving forward. A well suited man, a lawyer that was on a high profile drug case, stood in the center of three others. Two flanked his sides while the remaining trailed behind him. The only relevant one to Lexa was the woman standing to his left. She allowed herself one last fleeting look at the mocha colored skin and tight ringlet curls before turing her attention back to the door._

_“Eyes open. I don’t want any surprises. I want him in the car in two minutes tops,” Lexa commanded, hand resting on her holstered gun at her side._

_Everyone nodded at her words. This was the closest they were able to get lawyer. The closest exit to the curb with the least amount of open space. One suitable for transporting him safely._

_Or so they thought._

_It happened just before they reached the blacked out Escalade. The gun shots rang out, pinging off the pavement under them and sinking into the metal of the SUV. Her team swarmed the lawyer. Pressing him down as they began to return fire as best they could, only knowing the shooters general location. They moved as fast as they were able, trying to dodge as many bullets as possible. Just as they reached the midway distance the gunfire stopped. Like they had given up and just left._

_But Lexa knew better._

_They jumped as one._

_Men swarmed around them. Four on four. Evenly matched. Lexa took the brief reprieve to take into account that there were surprisingly no guns in their possession._

_That was all the time she had before they pounced. The brunette quickly shoved the lawyer towards the wall, hoping to keep him as far away from the men as possible. As she took stance against her opponent, in the back of her mind, she vaguely wondered just why they hadn’t shot them all dead when given the chance. They had them surrounded and apparently with a snipper hiding out._

_She kept herself between the man and the lawyer at all times as the fight began. Every time he tried to side step her she flung herself in the way, taking the brut of any punch or kick. She could hear her team taking down the men one by one as she finally beat the man into the ground. Blood sprayed from his nose, mouth, and left her white button up completely covered. Her knuckles burned, split open and her chest heaving._

_She could hear her team shouting above the buzzing in her ears. Adrenaline spiked in her veins. Her mind blurred. Worrying taking hold of her._

_“Costia!” Lexa called out as she wiped around._

_She could see her rising from the ground a few feet away, hand pressing against a bleeding arm. Nothing too serious from the looks of it. But her mind forgot what she was doing, who she was supposed to be protecting. She raced forward, attempting to get to the person who had her heart tearing in her chest at the sight of her blood._

_She didn’t feel the lawyer follow her. Didn’t care that he basically clung to the back of her shirt in fear. All that mattered was getting to Costia._

_Lexa came to a halt in front of her, the lawyer moving to their side as her hands found the cut along Costia’s arm._

_“Are you okay?”_

_Honey colored eyes danced across her’s with a light expression,“I’m fine. Nothing a few stitches won’t fix.”_

_With her eyes trained on the rest of the woman’s body, examining and prodding for any other injuries, she failed to notice one thing._

_The one thing that made a complete difference in her life. That turned it upside down._

_But Costia noticed._

_And Lexa prayed she never had._

_It was slow motion._

_Costia was flinging her sideways, putting herself in front of the lawyer as a single shot reverberated in her ears._

_The flood of tears were blurring but not enough to cover the twin pools of red the covered the concrete in front of her._

_Not one but two._

_She had failed both of them._

_A single bullet moving through Costia’s abdomen and into the lawyer. A miracle shot to the shooter._

_Lexa was upon her in an instant, trying to stop the bleeding. But Costia’s eyes only grew dimmer by the second. She could hear her the rest of her team surround them, the sound of sirens blaring, but they were already too late._

_Costia’s eyes were fading quickly, blood spilling from pale lips. But still she smiled at Lexa. Gave her a last fleeting image that she deserved. Of someone who was happy to have her last vision filled with someone she loved._

_“Don’t stop living. Live for me…promise me.”_

_A sob escaped her chest,“No, Cos. You’re gonna be fine. The ambulance the-they’re on their way. They’ll make you better.”_

_Lashes fluttered tiredly,“Promise me.”_

_She clung to the hand that lifted to her cheek. Desperately squeezed it as her chest ached._

_“I promise,” Lexa cried out._

_It was as if Costia held on for those last words. Not willing to leave the Earth until Lexa vowed to live. And in the back of her mind, Lexa thought that maybe, just maybe, if she had never said the words before the ambulance arrived, that Costia would have lived._

_It wasn’t until the next day, when she was sitting in her superior’s office, that she came to realize that she could only half way live up to Costia’s promise._

_“You did this. It’s because of you that they’re dead — that she’s dead. Because you let your emotions distract you.”_

_She would live. But she wouldn’t **live**._

_She breathed. Ate enough to keep her body going. But there was never something that made her feel alive. Nothing that sparked that little flame that had sat deep within her, long since blown out since having her love pass in her own arms._

_At least, not until her vision was over come by blue. A gorgeous hue that would either become her demise or her savior._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhhhhhh, I'm evil. So evil. I honestly didn't have the ending part planned out until right as I started writing it. I kind of just went with the flow and loved how it turned out. Anyway, it's late and I have work in the morning. Kudos and comments are appreciated and much welcomed! 
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies!
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> Xoxo


	5. Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A week after the alley incident. Clarke and Lexa finally (kinda) talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've discovered that I'm horrible at making these two stay enemies...like it's nearly impossible for me...BUT there will be hard times, quite a bit of anger, but also some...good times (if you catch my drift). SO even though this is supposed to be an enemies to friends to lovers fanfic, It's kinda gonna bounce back and forth. They'll have their ups and downs and basically just chase each other around until I get into that certain point of the story where they finally, ya know, admit their feelings for each other (although...(you'll know what that 'although' means when you read this))
> 
> Anyway, on with the story!

Blonde hair peeked out the cocoon of blankets at the sound of her door being beat upon. Muffled voices called out her name but Clarke only groaned and smothered herself deeper into the fluffy warmth.

It had been a week since that day.

Since she was being pushed roughly into the alleyway by the disgusting man.

Since _Lexa_ had saved her.

And it took everything for Clarke to leave her apartment each day. To act as normal as possible and pretend that nothing happened. But it didn’t help much when her heart would race and her palms would sweat with fear every time she passed another alley. She hadn’t even been to the cafe since and she was more than sure that Maya was worried about not seeing her on her usual Tuesday.

Clarke had even bailed out on helping Raven with her shop more in this past week than she ever had before. She felt secure and safe with the Latina around but it was every time a male customer came in that she would flinch and try to keep her distance. Try not to react with fear when they walked up to the counter that she sat behind and start talking to her about car services.

But it was slowly getting better with each day. And it helped much more than she realized when Officer Kane called her and told her that, thanks to Lexa’s official statement made a few days ago, that there was no need for her to testify; the man was going to be behind bars for quite some time. Clarke took comfort in that but pushed away the warm feeling that had risen in her heart when Lexa’s name was spoken.

The blonde couldn’t explain her feelings for the somewhat stoic woman. One moment she hated her for saying their night together was a mistake and another moment she was batting away at rising feelings. Feelings she knew wouldn’t be returned from the brunette…and that only made her anger simmer more. Clarke’s head was a jumbled mess of feelings and emotions, both from the events in the alley and the emerald eyes that invaded her sleep and every waking moment.

The sound of her front door slamming open pulled her from her thoughts and had her rolling her eyes as she heard Raven’s voice making it’s way towards her bedroom. She had just enough time to pull the covers over her head before the door swung open and crashed against her bedroom wall.

“Griffin! What the _hell_ are you still doing in bed? Get your ass up now!”

Clarke groaned in protest as the blankets were whisked away from her body, the cool air hitting her skin and making her shiver. She peeked one blurry eye open to see Raven standing at the foot of her bed, hands on hips, and a bored expression on her face.

“Why are you here, Rae?” Clarke rasped as she tried to find some lingering warmth in the sheets below her.

“To get you out of this damn rut! You’ve barely come out of your apartment this week! You missed two group study sessions _and_ you’ve bailed on me three times. I know you’ve been going to class but that’s _all_ you’ve been doing,” Raven said as she took a seat next to her on the bed,“I know you’re still scared about what happened that day but it’s not going to help you by just hiding from the world. You can’t let this pull you down, princess.”

Clarke rolled over so she was facing the brunette,“I’m not letting it pull me down.”

“Yes, you are,” Raven argued, sending a swift wack against Clarke’s leg,“I even went to the cafe to talk to Maya and she was worried and said she didn’t see you on your normal Tuesday. You’ve never missed a Tuesday since you started going there, Clarke.”

The blonde’s eyebrows rose slightly at the confession. She knew how much Raven hated the little corner cafe, what with her inhumanly dislike for the smell _and_ taste for coffee. She couldn’t even get the Latina to step one foot in the door after she found it, refusing because the smell would ‘make her puke her guts out’.

“I-I didn’t feel like going, that’s all,” Clarke whispered.

Raven’s eyes searched her before sighing,“Everyone knows what happened, Clarke. No one’s going to make fun of you for being scared. It’s a normal feeling after situations like that. Everyone’s just worried about you, even Octavia.”

Blue eyes rolled at the mention of her other best friend,“She’s so worried but she couldn’t be here to show it?”

“Hey, don’t count me out just yet. It takes time to get from the other side of town,” A voice said from the threshold of her bedroom door.

Clarke sat up in bed and smiled widely at the sight of the other brunette making her way towards them. She shuffled off the bed and pulled Octavia into a tight hug, thankful that she was finally seeing her after so long.

“Sorry I couldn’t be here sooner, Clarke. I choose a sucky ass time to go to LA,” Octavia whispered in her ear.

The blonde smiled and fell deeper into the hug. She wasn’t mad at Octavia for not being there for her, not that she really tried to see anyone the past week anyway. The brunette was a pretty successful personal trainer and was sometimes invited to attend conventions and teach classes and what not. Though, she was still never successful in getting Clarke to exercise for more than thirty minutes, if that.

“It’s okay, O. I know it was a work thing.You couldn’t have known it would happen anyway.”

Octavia’s arms tightened around her and Clarke felt the tension in her neck and shoulders ease up a bit at her friend’s familiar warmth.

“And to think all I got was a ‘why are you here, Raven’,” The Latina scoffed,“Where’s my hug?”

Both friends backed out of the hug and smirked wickedly at each other before dog piling on top of the unsuspecting woman. Laughter filled the bedroom as they all tumbled around the bed, a few pokes and wiggling fingers against ribs prolonging the sound and making it grow louder with each passing second. Once settled, the three women laid spread out over Clarke’s bed, eyes on the ceiling.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Octavia whispered from her spot next to it.

Clarke shook her head a bit,“Not really. It’s over. He’s behind bars. That’s all that matters, I guess.”

Raven propped herself on an elbow to look down at her,“You should still talk to someone about it, Clarke. Keeping it all bottled up isn’t going to help you. If not us then at least a therapist or…”

“Or?” The blonde urged her to continue.

“Maybe Lexa?”

A deep sigh billowed out passed her lips at the woman’s name. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to talk to Lexa or not.

“I don’t know, Rae. I thanked her for what she did. I don’t think there’s any more to talk about,” Clarke bit out.

This time, it was Octavia who sat up and flicked her eyes between her two friends,“This is the same Lexa that you slept with the other week?”

“You told her?” Clarke threw at Raven who merely shrugged.

She had told her friend about the events that occurred after leaving the club and the morning after the day before the alley incident. Raven, of course, had immediately claimed that she was right about the sexual tension and that Clarke had her to thank for getting laid and also scolded her for leaving her alone in the club without so much as a text.

“You would have told her yourself anyway. I just made the gossip train run a little faster,” Raven smirked.

Clarke rolled her eyes before addressing Octavia again,“Yes. The same Lexa that I slept with, who said it was a mistake, saved me that day.”

“Damn, small world,” The brunette said.

“Not really.”

Both girls looked at her, confused.

“What do you mean by that?” They both asked.

The blonde looked guilty between the two. She was a little upset with herself for not telling either one of her friends _exactly_ what happened that day, only letting them learn everything from news reports and police officers. She had only sent a quick text to Raven and her parents, who would have shown up at her doorstep if it weren’t for work, to let them know that she was safe and mostly unharmed. They had tried to get more out of her but when she refused to talk they knew there was no use trying to press her stubborn self.

“Clarke?” Octavia urged her out of thoughts.

Fingers played with the hem of her shirt as she continued staring at the ceiling.

“I went to the cafe that day because I actually had time to spare for once. I got my food and was ready to eat before I ran into Lexa. She…spilled her coffee all over me. Pulled me to the bathroom when a bunch of frat boys walked in because you could see my bra through my shirt. She gave me hers and then…”

She gave every little detail of what happened. From the moment Lexa flipped their positions and had her pinned against the bathroom wall down to her returning her necklace later that day. Raven and Octavia listened with rapt attention, sucking up every little bit of information and giving her shoulders comforting squeezes at hard parts.

“So she slept with you, told you it was a mistake the next morning,” Octavia replayed the events,“Two days later is pushing you up against the bathroom wall in a heated little session that you started to try and leave her high and dry only to have it backfire on you, then saves you from some sleaze bag, and goes back to being stoic after returning your necklace?”

“Basically,” Clarke sighed as she fingered her necklace that lay against her chest.

“Seems like you’re both just running away from your real emotions,” Raven says nonchalantly as she examines her nails.

And Clarke knew that her friend was right, at least for herself, not really knowing what Lexa felt at the moment. There was that little spark of emotion that swelled in her chest every time Lexa was mentioned or just happened to brush against her thoughts. She didn’t know what to call it but ever since her first encounter with the brunette it just always seemed to back bounce to hate. Was it just her heart using her anger to cover up her real emotions? Was Lexa doing the very same thing?

“You should go talk to her,” Octavia’s voice filtered through her mind.

Startled ocean eyes landed on her friend,“What?”

“Talk to her. Tell her how you really feel about everything that’s happened.”

“How I really fe—,” Raven was quick to cut her off.

“Yes, Clarke. How you really feel. Obviously when you left that club with her only after knowing her for a total of less than four hours you felt something for her. Everyone’s noticed that you’ve been acting weird and I know it’s because of her. You can’t hide it from me or Octavia.”

They were right. Maybe it was time for her to push this petty anger aside and actually talk to Lexa like the adult that she was. Well, was _supposed_ to be. But just how was she supposed to let her feelings out to the brunette when she clearly denied there being any feelings between them from the beginning. Obviously, she was more than likely to turn her down once again instead of reciprocating the feelings. But, maybe if she was true to herself and to Lexa, she would be able to get it all out of her head. Because if she was being honest the brunette was on her mind more than she liked to admit.

And that could only mean one thing.

She felt for her.

It freaked Clarke out just how fast her mind went from fretting over the events in the alleyway to being completely overwhelmed and feeling somewhat _safe_ while talking and thinking about Lexa.

“You’re right. I’ll go talk to her,” Clarke said determinedly as she stood from the bed.

Octavia and Raven watched her with wide eyes.

“Really? It was that easy?” Raven asked, shocked.

“Yeah.”

“Normally it takes your stubborn ass days to actually follow through with something. I’ll believe it when I see Lexa laying naked in your bed.”

Octavia snickered beside Raven.

“Well, you won’t be seeing her naked because that’s not going to happen. At least not yet. I don’t even know if she’ll return the feelings guys. She’s the one who said it was all a mistake when we slept together. I doubt she’s looking for another one night stand let alone a relationship,” Clarke sighed.

Raven stood from the bed, quickly whispering in Octavia’s ear and moved towards her door,“One way to find out.”

Octavia winked at her and pushed her out the bedroom a few moments later, Raven already opening the front door of her apartment and stepping into the hallway. Clarke stuttered as her friend pushed her out the apartment to stand before the door across the hall. The Latina currently leaned against the wall next to it playfully eyeing her as Octavia closed the door behind her.

“What are we doing out here?” Clarke asked nervously, already scared because she knew the answer she would receive.

“You’re the one that said you were going to talk to her and Octavia and I know that if we leave before you do then you’ll never do it. So we’re gonna make sure it happens.”

Before she had any time to question her best friends Raven was knocking loudly against Lexa’s door. Clarke was left, heart racing and a nervous sweat breaking along her spine, as both women ran down the hallway and towards the stairs, far away from her. By time the blonde had regained control of her stunned thoughts and was about to rush back into her apartment, the door of Lexa’s apartment was swinging open. Lexa stepped out slowly, hair up in a messy bun and an oversized ‘UDC’ t-shirt covering most of her frame, cotton sleeping shorts barely peeking out past it’s hem.

“Clarke? Everything okay?”

She hated how emotionless Lexa sounded when she asked the question. Clarke knew that there had to be something the brunette felt when they were together. This pull, the one that made her brain spin in circles and confuse her body to no end, couldn’t be felt just by her alone. There had to be something within Lexa, too.

Azure eyes floated down the end of the hallway trying see if her friends were still peeking out from somewhere but she got nothing. When she turned back she barely had time to register that Lexa had followed her quick glance before she was staring into those twin green pools. Her hands wrung together at the hem of her shirt, not able to pull her eyes away from Lexa’s.

“Um, yeah. Yeah, everything’s fine. I, uh…can we talk? Please?”

Lexa’s eyes traveled over her form, eyes seeming to widen as she looked at her shirt, although Clarke wasn’t sure why. Those pillowy lips pursed into a tight line as she leaned against the frame of her door.

“I’ve actually got com—.”

The brunette was cut off by a light shove behind her. Clarke tried to peer around her shoulder before a dirty blonde woman came into view next to her. The woman was a few inches taller than Lexa, angled cheek bones and flawless skin, Leather jacket hugging her shoulders as she stretched.

“I’m actually gonna head out. I’ve got somewhere to be. Have fun with your friend, Lex.”

Clarke watched with wide eyes as the woman waved to Lexa over her shoulder as she strut down the hallway. As she disappeared around the corner and down the stairs she heard Lexa let out a deep sigh. Slim fingers pinched the bridge of a delicate nose as she shook her head.

“I’m sorry about her. Anya is…well Anya. There’s really no explaining her,” Lexa said before straightening herself up,“You said you wanted to talk?”

Now something else was boiling in Clarke’s mind. Something that started as soon as Anya walked out of Lexa’s apartment looking like she just rolled out of bed. A bed they probably _shared_. She wasn’t able to stop the next words that tumbled from her lips. Her mind far too wrapped up in swirling emotions to filter exactly what she was going to say.

“Who was she? Another _mistake_?”

She didn’t want to be that girl. The one that was jealous and bitter about being turned down, but she was at this moment. Her anger clouded her judgement that Lexa thought her a mistake but not someone else.

“Anya?” Lexa laughed, ignoring the bite in Clarke’s words,“She’s my cousin.”

Clarke blanched, not expecting that answer. She stood there silently and nervously picked at her nails as she tried to form some sort of thought so she could reconcile the moment between them but everything failed her. She wasn’t sure how long they had been standing there before Lexa was pushing off the frame and walking back into her apartment slowly closing the door behind her.

“Wait!” Clarke cried out.

The door, once almost shut, was open once again, Lexa stepping back out into the hallway.

“What, Clarke? I thought you wanted to talk but instead you’re just standing there. I don’t feel like standing in the hallway all day waiting for you to say something,” Lexa replied.

“I do want to talk. I was…I’m sorry I snapped about Anya. I didn’t mean to. It was childish of me.”

“It’s okay,” Lexa whispered,“I understand.”

She wanted to laugh. Did she really? Did she really understand that she snapped because she was truly jealous because she thought Lexa was sleeping with someone else?

Clarke threw a thumb over her shoulder and shuffled nervously,“Do you mind, uh, if we talk at my place?”

Lexa seemed to contemplate the offer, glancing back inside her apartment for a moment before turning back and nodding,“Yeah, that’s fine.”

Both women walked slowly into Clarke’s apartment, the door shutting behind Lexa with a soft ‘click’ that reverberated through the silence. The blonde couldn't stop the rush of heat that rose in her cheeks, and _other_ places, as they sat on her couch. The very one that Lexa had her bent over not too long ago. She tried to keep the memories of them together, panting and sweaty, as Lexa shifted next to her. Clarke caught the subtle clench of her thighs and instantly knew that her thoughts had drifted to the same place as her’s.

“So,” Lexa drawled out,“What did you want to talk about?”

That little question almost made her sick. The thought that she was about to express her covered up feelings for the brunette making her dizzy in her seat. What if Lexa thought she was lying? What if she just laughed in her face and told her that she thought she hated her? What if…

 _No_.

She needed to do this. It had been swirling in her mind since that first night together. And it only built every day. There was no stopping it in her mind. But first things first.

“I know I already said thank you, but I wanted to say it again,” Clarke mumbled as she looked up at Lexa,“Thank you, for saving me. I don’t…I’m not—.”

The words were caught in her throat and she could see Lexa’s eyes fill with something. Anger. Sadness. There was more there, too much to decipher in her currently state of a tight chest and blurry vision. As the first tear trailed down her cheeks she felt herself being tugged. Warm arms wrapped around her securely and she breathed in the woodsy scent of Lexa as she buried her face into her neck.

She wasn’t sure where this had come from. Wasn’t aware that the fear was stronger than what she originally thought. It was more than likely because she had buried it and was just now bringing everything back up to the surface to thank Lexa for what she did. She was bringing back the fears, the flashes, that she had when she was trapped against that wall.

“I tho-thought that was the end. Th-that I wouldn’t see anyone else again,” Clarke hiccuped,“My parents, Raven and Octavia… _you_. I was so scared.”

Clarke felt Lexa stiffen in surprise at the mention of herself. She couldn’t have been expecting the blonde to think about her in a near death situation. Lexa’s arms loosened and gently pushed her back as one hand rose to cup her cheek, thumb delicately brushing over the fading scar there while wiping away salty tears. Thick black lashes fluttered at the feeling, the memory of the cold biting blade being replaced with Lexa’s warm fingertip and let her breath a little easier.

But still the memories of being shoved against the wall invaded her mind. She couldn’t stop them from repeating over and over in her head. The feeling of grimy hands on her skin making her shiver so violently that the brunette’s ministrations against her cheek halted. When she felt the warm slipping away she quickly grabbed a hold of it and placed it back with slight pressure.

“Don’t,” Clarke whispered as the resurfacing memory faded away once again,“Please, don’t stop.”

She could hear, and see, the gentle bob of Lexa’s throat as she swallowed thickly. Clarke was surprised by the amount of comfort she so willingly handed over despite thinking that they couldn’t be together. That they were a _mistake_. But Lexa said nothing and just comforted Clarke the way she needed.

This was supposed to be a talk about their feelings but somehow got turned around into a comforting session. But Clarke couldn’t find it in herself to care. Not when Lexa’s skin and light breath fanning across her cheeks made the fears, the flashes, fade away. At least some of them. There were still a few lingering there. Filling the space in her mind that she couldn’t seem to push away.

And suddenly she was standing from her couch, urgently pulling Lexa up with her.

“Clarke, what are you doing?”

“Do you trust me?” The blonde asked as she pulled her further away from the leather surface.

The brunette’s eyes clouded in confusion before slowly nodding, albeit somewhat hesitantly.

Clarke lead them over to the same wall that Lexa had her pinned to the night they met. The images were there, the heavy breathing in her ear and Lexa moving against her. Without words, the blonde turned around and placed her back against the wall and slowly pulled Lexa towards her. She could feel the little protest in Lexa’s muscles as she got closer, their hips almost touching.

“I can’t,” Lexa whispered.

“ _Please_ ,” Clarke brokenly whispered as her image of the man was replaced with Lexa,“I know I shouldn’t be asking you this after how I acted towards you. I thought I hated you and didn’t know how to react. And I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. But please, don’t leave me. Just…do this for me, listen to me, and then you can go. I won’t stop you. I won’t bother you anymore.”

There was that little release of held breath that came from Lexa’s lips before she was fully pressed against Clarke. Chest to chest, hip to hip, toe to toe. Foreheads suddenly grazing, noses bumping…lips a hair’s breath away. But neither one of them makes that move, the one that would bring them together completely. In her mind Clarke could slowly feel that brick wall being replaced by the smooth one beneath her now. Filthy hands were shoved aside by warm inviting ones. That breath that ghosted across her skin was sweet, minty, instead of rancid and matted with slight alcohol.

Those horrible memories, the ones that woke her up at night and had her fearing the streets she walked every day, were wiped away. Wiped away and replaced by what was happening here -now. With Lexa. Being in her arms…it made everything better. Clarke wasn’t sure just how it did, why it was so easy for Lexa, but it did. Ever so slowly it was like that certain time frame never happened. That she was instead still wrapped in Lexa’s form in the cafe’s bathroom.

And it only made her feelings harder to hide…but she didn’t want to hide them anymore.

 _ **“You can do this, Clarke. This is what you wanted to do. Let her know how you feel. Even if she turns you down…like you know she will,”**_ Clarke thought to herself as her fingers traced sharp jawline.

The head of golden curls backed up as much as it could. Blue eyes peaked open and and failed to met green as they hid behind closed lids. Lexa’s face was one of pure concentration. As if she was keeping herself at bay. It had Clarke’s heart fluttering, wondering if the brunette was holding herself back form advancing on her…or maybe just trying to stop herself from pulling away. Her heart clenched painfully at the latter.

“Lexa,” Clarke began lowly,“I didn’t expect this to happen. I really did want to talk to you about something.”

Those vast emerald orbs blinked open, zeroing in on Clarke in a millisecond,“Okay, then talk.”

Pearl white teeth worried at her bottom lip as she revved herself up for her confession.

“I know that things haven’t been the best between us since…well, since that night,” Lexa’s hands fell from her cheeks to land on her hips,“I-I can’t hide from it anymore, Lexa. I can’t. I know you said what we did was a mistake but I can’t help but think that’s a lie. And you know it too. You know there’s something different there. Something _more_.”

Lexa’s jaw clenched as she threw her gaze to the side but Clarke was quick to grab her chin softly and pull her back into her line of vision.

“I can see it in your eyes. You’re just holding it back. Why? Why are you so scared to be with me?” Clarke whispered.

“It’s not you, Clarke…,” Lexa trailed off.

“It’s you, right?” Clarke wanted to scoff at the overused words but decided against it.

“I can’t. It was a mis—.”

The blonde’s blonde’s fingers tightening desperately against her chin stopped her words.

“Don’t!” Clarke billowed with shaky lips,“Don’t say it was a mistake. It _wasn’t_ and you know it. Dammit, Lexa. Why can’t you just admit that?”

The next second she was pushed fully against the wall, more than she previously was. Hands moved against her ribs softly brushing the underside of her breasts. Lips parted her’s in a desperate dance. Languid but needy all in one. A blur of emotions behind the pillowy lips that left Clarke dazed and confused as they broke away.

“Be angry with me all you want but I can’t let you get hu-…It was a mistake, Clarke. Just leave it at that,” Lexa whispered against her cheek, hands smoothing over blonde locks as she pulled her closer for one last moment.

And then she was gone. A bitter brush of cool air replacing her as she left Clarke leaning against the wall for support. And she couldn’t move. There was that feeling, rising to the surface, only to be swashed down once again. This time by the bitter anger, the one that was _real_ and not something she was hiding behind. Fingers danced over her lips as she chuckled darkly, Lexa’s words echoing in her head.

She tried. She really did. And she got the outcome that she expected. Still no returned feelings.

But she didn’t realize how _cold_ it made her.

At least the fears were gone, replaced by that strong body and twin green pools that she’d come to both love and hate. She would cling to that newly formed memory and let it last as long as she needed it. Either until she no longer carries the feeling that she does or until Lexa finally realizes what that _something_ is that Clarke could see shimmering deep into her eyes.

She prayed to the stars that it would be the latter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically, Clarke's already admitted her feelings. Just not in the words that everyone does. She knows there's something more there and she wants to explore that with Lexa, who, not so much. I'm pleased with how this bounced around. Going from Clarke wanting to thank her for saving her, asking her to comfort her when she thought she really didn't need it, and then to admitting her feelings. I love just the jumble of things and I just hope it wasn't too confusing to you all. I also loved replacing Clarke's experience in the alley with memories of Lexa. Don't know how y'all with react to it but I think it came out pretty well. ;) (Oh, and totally forgot all about Octavia so sorry for just throwing her in there) 
> 
> Can't wait to work on the next chapter and dig further into this story, even with how confusing it can be sometimes. But next chapter, we'll see a little bit more of Lexa's feelings, maybe a little more of Anya, and some other things I haven't really planned yet. ;)
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies! 
> 
> Love to all! 
> 
> Xoxo


	6. Losing All Self Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa loses her self control. And a look at five months ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally...this took me three days! I hit a good bit of writers block with this chapter and it's a little shorter than what I would normally write but hey, it's something! I'm just hoping it's good enough and kinda flows just a bit with the story and how things are going to start playing out between them. Also, just a head's up, don't freak out at the end. The story isn't going to stay five months ahead. (More notes at the end!)

Lexa watched silently from her perch behind a bookshelf in the library as Clarke jotted down notes along with her study group. It had been a few quiet days since their little ‘chat’ in the blonde’s apartment. And thankfully each one was uneventful.

She did her best to avoid the blonde as much as she could without making it look like she never left her apartment while also not making it look like she was leaving whenever she left. Normally she would wait for Clarke to be nearly done with her morning routine, made a little easier thanks to the live video feed, and leave a few minutes before the blonde. Next day a few minutes after.

As long as she didn't come face to face with her, she was fine.

The sound of Clarke’s stifled giggles had Lexa snapping out of her momentary lapse in concentration. Green eyes found the blonde reaching across the table and playfully slapping the hand of a perky dirty blonde who in turn showed her scrunched up face to the woman. There was just that slightest twinge of something in Lexa’s chest when Clarke pulled the woman’s hand across the table and placed a kiss to her knuckles.

Her back met the bookshelf behind her as she tore her eyes away from the scene, her chest tight and heaving uncomfortably. From what she remembered from the information Clarke’s parents had handed to her that woman had to have been Harper. The one that lead Clarke’s study group. But apparently they seemed to be becoming more than study buddies.

 _ **“No, Woods. You can’t get jealous. You’re the one that pushed her away,”** _ Lexa scolded herself as she took a quick peak around the shelf to see that Clarke had gone back to jotting down notes on her computer.

Brunette waves fell back against the shelf once more as Lexa let her eyes fall shut. She shouldn’t be feeling these things. She shouldn’t be feeling  _anything_ for Clarke let alone jealousy. The blonde had every right in the world to flirt or be with anyone she wanted.

But still Lexa’s blood boiled.

An all too familiar prickle along her neck had Lexa slowly opening her eyes, leaning heavily back agains the shelf and crossing her arms.

“You can come out now.”

A lone figure stepped into space just in front of Lexa, mimicking the brunette’s position against the opposite shelf. Lexa let a bored expression settle over her face as she eyes the woman before her. She wasn’t at all surprised to see her.

“I was wondering when you were going to come and find me,” Lexa whispered with a quick glance back to Clarke.

Octavia scoffed from her spot, drawing Lexa’s eyes back to her,“How long have you been watching her?”

“Not long. I’m guessing Lincoln mentioned something to you?”

“Actually,” Octavia stressed while ignoring the bodyguard’s question,“Why are you watching her? What’s going on?”

Lexa sighed deeply before steeling her eyes and locking them onto the brunette across from her.

“I was hired by her parents to watch her. I can’t give any details other than that.”

It wasn’t necessarily a lie. While she didn’t know exactly why she was hired to watch over Clarke she did know that she was prohibited from discussing any details that might put Clarke’s life in danger. And while Octavia was a well known friend of the blonde’s, Lexa couldn’t be too careful with what information she gave out. It was bad enough that Octavia knew she was here and watching over Clarke.

“Lincoln didn’t actually tell me outright that it was Clarke you were guarding,” The feisty brunette said, finally coming back to Lexa’s first question,“We were talking and I asked about you and he said you were on a high profile case, didn’t give me a name or anything. It wasn’t until I got a call from Raven about Clarke leaving her at a bar with someone named Lexa and then later on that same Lexa saving her the other day that I realized it had to be you. Didn’t really know it was Clarke you were watching until well, now really.”

Lexa started at Octavia silently for quite some time. She had to give it to the younger girl. She was clever. Probably too clever for Lexa’s liking.

Octavia’s boyfriend and Lexa’s longtime friend, Lincoln, worked on occasion with Lexa. She had been introduced to the brunette during a last minute dinner with Lincoln who thought it was a perfect time for her to finally meet the brunette. The bodyguard wasn’t at all surprised that she had yet to meet Clarke or Raven through Octavia, seeing as to how she was mainly traveling across the country on different jobs. There was the occasional dinner with the couple, sometimes Anya tagging along, but never one joined by Octavia’s two best friends.

“So you really don’t know the real reason you’re guarding her?”

The brunette saw the concern shifting through Octavia’s eyes as she peered around the shelf to glance at her best friend.

“I was given details on her daily life, who’s in it, and just to keep her safe and alive. Other than that…nothing,” Lexa breathed.

There was a brief silence between them as Octavia leaned back against the shelf behind her and fixed her with a pointed look.

“What?”

“You slept with her.”

A perfect eyebrow arched high,“And?”

“What happened to ‘I don’t sleep with clients’?” Octavia smirked.

Lexa’s jaw clenched, the words nearly dying in her throat,“It was nothing. It’s over.”

“Well, she doesn’t want it to be,” Octavia said as she pushed forward to stand closer to the brunette,“She feels something for you, Lexa. You need to talk to her instead of just pushing her up against walls, kissing her, and then leaving.”

“You know why I can’t, Octavia,” Lexa sighed.

The brunette was familiar enough with her to know her story with Costia, although Lexa tried to keep it from everyone. But that quickly failed when the persistent brunette tried to set her up with every woman she could and Lexa was forced to explain that she didn’t date because of her job and what happened with Costia. Because of the danger it brought.

Because she couldn’t bare to lose someone close to her again.

“But Clarke’s different,” Octavia tried,“She just doesn’t feel things like she’s clearly feeling. And she can protect herself just fine. I know a few days ago with the incident it didn’t seem like it but she can. Just…give her a chance. I think there could be something good between both of you.”

Lexa’s nostrils flared at the anger that coursed through her veins at the thought of Clarke’s assault. But still, she couldn’t let Octavia’s words get to her. No matter how much she wanted to listen to them.

“That’s all you came here for?” Lexa asked, feigning a tone of boredom.

Octavia stood before her, mouth ajar and eye brows crinkled together as if she was trying to figure out just how Lexa wanted her to answer.

The brunette pushed away from the shelf,“If that’s all you wanted to talk about then you can leave.”

And without another spared glance, Lexa brushed her shoulder against Octavia’s and made her way through the library, intent on finding another vantage spot to watch Clarke. Preferably away from Octavia.

* * *

Lexa thanked every god when Clarke finally began packing her belongings and whispering goodbyes to her friends. She was careful to keep a decent distance between them, while also keeping Clarke in sight, before following after the blonde.

She couldn’t help it when Octavia’s words penetrated her thoughts while she stared at Clarke’s back.

Did Clarke really feel something as strong as Octavia had described?

 ** _“She has to, you idiot. Or was her begging you to admit that you really feel something for her not enough for you to understand?”_** Lexa scolded herself.

Maybe Lexa was just too foolish to realize her own feelings for Clarke. Or maybe it was just her pushing them away because she knew they would be too painful. It had been a while since she had felt anything for anyone and Lexa wasn’t sure how to react to it. From past experiences, meaning Costia, she knew that trying to follow them only lead to pain. Not only for her but the person she cared for. It was easier to just let them go. To be alone.

_Love is weakness._

While her thoughts somewhat distracted her, she was still able to remember to check her phone for the live security feed of Clarke’s apartment right before the blonde walked into their building. Once knowing everything was secure Lexa waited the usual three minutes after Clarke disappeared into the building before following. She checked the feed one last time, seeing Clarke rummaging around in her kitchen, as she cleared the last step to their floor. The brunette shoved the device into her back pocket with a sigh and pulled her key out as she reached her door.

Just as she was about to put her key into the slot the sound of a door opening behind her had her freezing in her movements. And not just any door.

_Clarke’s door._

There was a light exhale of breathe from Clarke that Lexa was sure she could feel brush against the nape of her neck. A tingle shot down her spine as she slowly peered over her shoulder and caught panicked blue eyes. Clarke, mid step out her door, held a full garbage bag, froze as she stared at Lexa. There was something in her gaze. Something that reached out to Lexa and begged her to say _something. Anything._

And it was like something snapped inside Lexa.

Like there was nothing that could hold back the flood of emotions that just burst forth while staring at the sweatpants clad blonde. Her keys were hastily shoved in her pants pocket before she fumbled forward, sure steps leading her right into Clarke’s space. The bag that was fisted with tight white knuckles fell with a ‘plop’ onto the hardwood below their feet followed by a sharp gasp.

Lexa’s hands cradled Clarke’s face instantly, urgently and softly, fingertips filled with need. Pulling her lips to her’s and leaving no room for even a whispered breath. She half expected to be shoved away, kicked and punched for just jumping Clarke like she was but she was met with an almost equal need, if not greater. There were only milliseconds between their lips sliding together before Lexa was urging the blonde backwards and kicking the door closed with her foot.

Without breaking apart their lips the brunette dipped down and lifted Clarke by her thighs, urging them to wrap around her waist. It wasn’t until she pushed her back against the nearest wall did the blonde tear her lips away with a deafening gasp. Lexa wasted no time, setting a path down Clarke’s neck with her lips and tongue. Biting and soothing. Sucking sensitive spots. Unknowingly leaving her mark in the haze that she had been swept up in.

Clothes were tugged. Lexa’s hands slid up and under Clarke’s shirt, past the lace trim hugging her ribs, pulling forth another breathless gasp from the blonde. She could feel her tremble beneath her hands as she cupped a warm breast. Felt the nipple pebble at the slight brush of her fingertips. Lexa’s other hand twisted around and conformed to the arch of Clarke’s back, blunt nails scraping softly down the milky skin.

Lexa’s skin burned to have Clarke’s against her’s and she could barely stop herself from just ripping her clothes from her body. She made quick work, mentally smirking when she heard a displeased groan sound from the blonde’s lips when she pulled her hands away from her body. Thought it didn’t last long. Clarke’s shirt hit the floor silently and Lexa had her mouth closed around a perky breast before her bra fell on top.

An audible thump sounded from Clarke’s head hitting the wall, a loud moan following right after. Lexa’s hands drifted down and snuck into the blonde’s pants, firmly gripping her ass and pulling her center to grind against her’s. She couldn’t help but break away from the supple skin to release a moan of her own as heat flared in her core. The subtle grind leaving her knees in the wake of buckling and giving way.

But she wouldn’t end like this.

No.

She was going to take Clarke how she wanted.

Make her body buzz and float more than their first night together.

This….this was something more.

Lexa still wasn’t sure if she would allow herself to fall into whatever this was becoming between but she had to have this. At least this one moment with Clarke. She couldn’t control her body’s call any longer. The need to be with Clarke, to feel her quake under her, to feel her walls flutter around her fingers endlessly.

Before she knew it they were in Clarke’s room. Naked and panting. Lexa hovering over the blonde and letting her eyes trail over flushed skin and hooded eyes. Fingers caressed the soft curve of Clarke’s hip and slowly trailed lower, lower. She could practically feel Clarke’s body thrumming under her as she brushed against coarse golden curls.

Just when she was ready to slide her fingers through the warm silk a hand wrapping around her wrist stopped her short.

“What are we doing, Lexa?”

Lexa adjusted her position, hovering over Clarke, and stared down intensely at the woman. Her mind wondered as she became lost in twin ocean orbs. What were they doing? Lexa had lost all self control and just let her body react on it’s own. And now here she was, naked and hovering above the woman that she told she couldn’t be with, ready to take her to the highest oblivion there was.

“I…I’m not sure,” Lexa whispered and it had been a while since she was so unsure of herself or her feelings,“But I don’t want to stop. I don’t know where we can go from here but I don’t want to stop. Not at all.”

Clarke’s hands cupped her jaw. Thumbs brushed against her cheeks before the rest of her fingers tangled in brunette waves and pulled her down. Their lips crashed together. A battle of tongues and teeth but still perfectly passionate and…loving. A surprised gasp lifted from Clarke’s throat as Lexa’s fingers wondered down to her center, pushing through swollen lips and circling softly before plunging in.

And this was different. So much different from the first night they shared together. Lexa could feel Clarke all around her. Lips and teeth set against her shoulder, fingers scraping down her back with every thrust, ankles hooked at the small of her back as Lexa used her hips for extra leverage. The blonde’s breath puffed along the shell of her ear with each pleasure filled moan and Lexa felt her own body become taunt with need.

But right now, she wanted to push Clarke over the edge. She wanted to see the glazed expression shown in those blue eyes as she teetered on the edge before falling over completely.

Lexa’s thrusts sped up.

“ _God, Lexa_ ,” Clarke mewled,“Keep going. Faster, please.”

Her fingers were quick, in and out of warm slick walls. A brutal pace but still there was that undeniable feeling that lingered at the back of Lexa’s mind. And all too soon she felt Clarke’s walls begin to flutter around her fingers, tightening and trying to pull her in deeper and Lexa leaned down to sweep her lips across a slack jaw.

_“Come for me, Clarke.”_

And Clarke did. Back bowing off the bed, head thrown back, toes curled and feet digging into Lexa’s ass to pull her impossibly closer. A broken throaty moan spilled from Clarke’s lips with each slow plunge of Lexa’s fingers as she tried to help her ride her high. Creamy thighs trembled around her hips and fingernails scrapped at her shoulders as the blonde slowly came down from her climax. Clarke began curling her body around Lexa’s, pulling her down and making her settle atop her. Breasts against breasts. Hips against hips.

Tingling lips sweeping together.

Lexa’s heart skipped a beat at the way Clarke clung to her. Like if she were to let go that the brunette would just disappear and never return. So she allowed her to keep her trapped against her body and just let her mind completely familiarize itself with the feel of Clarke’s body. Every curve and dip. Every little unconscious movement her body made after such a high.

But she knew that she couldn’t continue to lay on Clarke forever and slowly shifted to lay beside her on her back. Clarke said nothing as she moved, eyes still closed and hands falling down around her head into blonde curls. Lexa observed her from the corner of her eyes, waiting for something to just…happen. Whether it was Clarke yelling at her and telling her to leave for playing with her like she was or maybe…

Suddenly, Clarke was straddling her. Hands fitted right below her breasts and sliding across expanding ribs. Blue eyes twinkled darkly as the blonde eyed her. Taking in her ruffled appearance and tilting her head to the side as a small smile appeared over her face.

“I don’t want this to stop either, Lexa,” Clarke whispered hoarsely.

Green eyes widened even though she had been expecting something along those lines to leave Clarke’s lips. How could she not after what Octavia told her? It was just the tone of Clarke’s voice. The sadness, hopefulness, and _something else_ that was laced deep within. And so Lexa did the only thing she could do.

Slender hands locked behind Clarke’s neck and pulled her down, lips finding their way to the soft patch of skin just below her ear where Lexa knew would make Clarke shiver.

_“Then don’t.”_

And they didn’t. Not for the rest of the day or night. Sheets tangled and forgotten at the foot of the bed. A feather pillow beneath Clarke’s head somehow tearing open in Lexa’s strong grip and coating them both in downy white feather. They floated above them, slowly floating like snow and sticking to sweat slicked bodies lost in passion, coating them and the room in a coat of white.

A night of reprieve from the responsibilities that would surely find them in the next morning.

And both silently wondered what the next morning would bring for them as they fell asleep curled against each other.

* * *

_Five Months Later…_

“Don’t you fucking touch he-!”

Lexa’s words tampered off as a fist flew into her gut, knocking her on the ground and out of the grip of the two men that held her. She held in the groan that threatened to rise and instead kept her eyes trained on Clarke. The blonde thrashed in the hold of the bald man, thrown over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, beating against his back and demanding to be put down. He stared down at her with a nasty smirk as his hand crept up from it’s place on the back of Clarke’s knees towards her ass.

The brunette’s chest rumbled with an animalistic growl when she heard Clarke’s protests die and form into a near silent whimper. She was sure that the woman was having flashbacks of the day in the alley and she wanted nothing more than to cut the man’s hand from his body.

“Oh, someone doesn’t like when I touch what’s their’s?” The man taunted,“Well, if she gives my boss what he wants she probably won’t be your’s for long.”

Lexa bolted from her spot on the ground, getting enough distance to crash her head into the man’s nose and send blood pouring forth. The two men that held her earlier knocked a few good punches into her ribs before holding her up in a steel grip. The bald man sputtered, hand covering his nose and trying wipe away the blood.

“You bitch! You’re going to fucking pay for that! I was just going to kill you but I guess we’ll just let you watch our boss have fun with your girl,” The man spat before swiftly turning around and walking away from the van they were previously in.

Lexa tried to break free from the men, to get to Clarke and tear her away from the vile man, but whatever they used to knock them out was still somewhat lingering in her system. All she could do was let them drag her forward and her eyes caught the helpless gaze of Clarke. Lexa steeled her emotions and mouthed to her that everything would be okay. She couldn’t let Clarke begin to lose hope. They would get out of this. Clarke would get out of this.

Lexa would dam well make sure of that.

They walk through woods for what felt like hours but in reality was probably only thirty minutes. Lexa’s foggy mind finally registered the large two story wooden cabin that was nestled perfectly between a cluster of trees ahead of them. Her heart lurched as her eyes scanned the outside perimeter. Men, with guns, walked around the cabin. Probably ten in total and that was just outside. If these guys were as serious as Lexa was beginning to realize they were then there many more inside.

None spared them a glance as they made their way into the cabin and Lexa felt somewhat grateful not to have so many unknown eyes trained on her while defenseless. They moved through the cabin with such haste that Lexa wasn’t able to completely map out the place. They walked down a hallway, stopping at a door midway before the man carrying Clarke unlocked it and threw it open. Lexa was released and pushed to follow as he carried Clarke down the stairs, leading into what she assumed was a dark basement.

The bald man gave no care about where he placed Clarke. Throwing her from his shoulder and on the cold concrete below them. No longer held by the men, Lexa rushed over to her, wrapping her arms around her securely. She was ready to throw her body over Clarke’s to protect her if need be. A deep snort had her head whipping back to watch as the men moved back toward the stairs. Lexa was barely able to make out their forms as they walked further towards the stairs.

“Boss will be here soon to talk to your girl. Don’t try anything stupid. You won’t get out,” The bald man sneered before turning and making his way up the stairs.

Lexa didn’t even try to follow, knowing that even with only a locked door that could barely hold her back she would never be able to fight all those men on her own. Instead, she cradled Clarke softly. Pulling her head to rest on her chest and running her fingers through soft golden locks.

“It’s going to be okay, Clarke. We’ll get out of here,” Lexa whispered into the crown of her head.

Silently, Lexa began planning any form of an escape plan she could.

Even deciding that it didn’t matter if she made it out…

Just as long as Clarke did. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really liked adding the ending. Giving you just a little bit more from the scene from the first chapter. But don't worry. We won't stay there. Next chapter should see us come back to the morning after unless I hit some sort of inspiration and things change, which is common for me. All in all, I hope this was a good update and not just my brain thinking it's good because, like I said, I had such a hard time with this one. Idk. 
> 
> But, thanks for reading and commenting! You all are what keeps me writing! :)  
> (Also, currently trying to create a moodboard for this fic so keep an eye out on my tumblr!)
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies!
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> Xoxo


	7. Sniper In The Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something creeps in the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't shoot! 
> 
> I'm so sorry! These past few weeks, or is it months?, have been crazy. I haven't had as much time to write as I would like but I promise I will keep going! Just at a bit of a slower pace! I'm on about five hours of sleep and sick so I hope this chapter isn't too wonky. A lot of talking happens here, and I know it's probably not the best thing to happen in this story but I've got a plan for it trust me! I know it's labeled as enemies to friends to lovers fic but it kinda bounces back and forth. They'll go from enemies to lovers in one chapter and so on and so forth. There's going to be a lot of bouncing around and conflicting emotions so get ready for this rollercoaster. 
> 
> I hope you all will like it and the wait didn't disappoint you! :)

Blue eyes stared at the ceiling. Too many thoughts swirling in her mind and giving Clarke a headache. Her hands played absentmindedly with the downy feathers strewn across her bed. Neither her nor Lexa energized enough to care about cleaning them from the bed before falling asleep.

Speaking of Lexa…

Clarke turned her glazed eyes over to the bare back facing her. She traced the lines of Lexa’s tattoo all the way down her spine wondering if there was some story behind it. They had spent most of the night wrapped around each other. No words, only wild kisses and wondering touches. Clarke had felt something change in Lexa after she said she didn’t want stop. She was gentler. More languid in her kisses. Versus the roughness of their first night together.

But Clarke knew it wouldn’t matter.

Despite Lexa obviously not holding back on her urges last night, when Clarke peered into her eyes, she could still see that faint restraint behind those emerald orbs. Lexa wasn’t fully letting herself out to Clarke, wasn’t giving her everything she felt. And Clarke wanted it. She yearned for it. She wanted to see and feel the emotions play across Lexa’s skin as she drove her to climax. Wanted to see it unhindered in her eyes when they fluttered open from sleep.

“I can hear you thinking,” A muffled voice came from besides her.

Clarke’s eyes fluttered, only now registering that Lexa had turned over and was now facing her, the sheets thankfully pulled up over her chest.

“It’s nothing,” Clarke mumbled turning back to the ceiling.

Lexa sighed, rolling over on her stomach and pushing up onto her elbows.

“It’s not nothing, Clarke. I know it’s about last night. What happened…I knew it wouldn’t go without us having to have a discussion about it this morning.”

“I already asked you last night, Lexa,” Clarke huffed, sitting up and facing the brunette,“And the answer you gave me wasn’t good enough.”

Lexa’s jaw clenched,“You mean about what were doing? Where this is going to go?”

“Yes,” It was a broken whisper, tired of being repeated once again.

“I answered you honestly,” Lexa said softly,“I’m not sure. And by that, I mean I’m not sure what more we can be outside of this apartment, Clarke.”

Bitterness crept up into Clarke’s chest as she flung the sheets away from her body, standing and stalking around the room for some clean clothing.

“Why?” Clarke snarled as she turned back to Lexa,“Why are you not sure? How hard is it for you to just admit that you want more. Is it…is it because you don’t want to be seen with me? Is there someone else? What?”

Lexa hopped from the bed slowly making her way over to the fuming blonde.

“It’s neither of those reasons, Clarke. I can’t…I can’t tell you. Honestly.”

“Then why do this?” Clarke yelled as she gestured over the feather covered room and Lexa’s naked body,“Why put us both through this when you know you can’t be with me how we both want? Why?”

Angry blue eyes bore into green. A shroud of emotions falling over Lexa’s face as she contemplated her words.

Clarke knew this would happen but yet she didn’t prepare herself enough for it. After the first rejection she thought it would hurt less. Well, she was mistaken. If anything it hurt worse. Drove into her heart and ripped it out piece by piece.

Lexa fumbled for the right words.

“I-I do-don’t know, Clarke.”

“That’s not good enough, Lexa! There has to be a reason! Something you’re not telling me.”

When, after a few moments of silence, Clarke thought she would get no other answer from Lexa she tried to storm from the room only to be stopped by Lexa.

Her hands wrapped around her hips, pulled her back and encircled her middle. Soft lips pressed into the thin material of her shirt, grazing along her shoulder blades and slowly moving to the back of her neck.

“The last person I was with…They got hurt because of me,” Lexa whispered,“I can’t let that happen to you.”

“I’m not them, Lexa. Whatever happened…it’s not going to happen to me,” Clarke whispered feeling the anger leave her body slowly.

“I know but…I can’t…I can’t take that chance. Not with you.”

Clarke slowly turned in Lexa’s hold, wanting to face the woman and look into her eyes. She cupped her cheeks gently and eyed the small sheen of tears covering her eyes. Realization dawned on Clarke. Everything Lexa told her…wasn’t because she didn’t care…it was because she did. _So much_.

“Lexa…,” Clarke spoke softly.

Lexa swallowed thickly, straightening her posture and setting her jaw firmly.

“If you want something with me, Clarke…it can’t go past these walls. I can’t give you a normal relationship…not right now.”

Clarke pushed away from her, the dullness in Lexa’s tone splitting through her like a knife, anger coating her own voice as she spoke.

“Why? Why, Lexa? What’s so bad in your life that you can’t be in a normal relationship with me?”

“I can’t tell you dammit! Don’t you listen!?” Lexa yelled, hands clenching into fists at her sides.

Clarke couldn’t lie and say that she didn’t jump at the woman’s shout. Not from fear but from sudden shock. She hadn’t quite expected Lexa to yell as she had. Clarke knew by the way Lexa fumbled with her words that she was becoming quickly frustrated but didn’t know she was that close to exploding.

She watched as Lexa took in a steady breath. Trying to calm herself so she could speak normally.

“What we have,” Lexa began slowly,“It can’t go further than this.”

She gestured between her own bare body and Clarke’s half clothed one. Clarke brushed her legs together suddenly wishing she had thrown on some pants before starting the argument with Lexa.

“Despite what yo-…we feel, it can’t go anywhere. You can have me here for however many nights but once I step out that door, it never happened.”

Clarke contemplated her options. She was still upset that Lexa couldn’t - _wouldn’t_ \- fully commit to being with her. Even when they both clearly wanted it. _But_ …but here was Lexa, offering to give herself in one way. A way that Clarke knew, if she didn’t accept, she’d probably never get another opportunity at again. It wasn’t exactly what she wanted, far from it, but having Lexa at least in some shape or form was better than no Lexa at all.

If Lexa could only be with her behind her apartment door then there was nothing stopping her here in this moment.

“Only here?” Clarke whispered as she stepped closer.

Lexa eyed her fingers, the ones that skimmed at the hem of her shirt barely brushing the bare skin underneath.

“Only here,” She repeated hoarsely.

Clarke hated it…but this was apparently the only way she could have Lexa.

Her shirt was off and on the floor before anything else happened. She moved forward, surprised when Lexa met her half way and swept her into her arms. Clarke felt Lexa lead her backwards probably intending to push her back onto a wall but was met by her dresser. Her bare bottom met the cold wooden surface and she jumped at the feeling, a lone shot of electricity coursing up her spine.

It was slow for a moment, maybe longer than what Clarke’s mind comprehended, but before she knew it Lexa’s words slowly crept back into her mind.

_I can’t._

_I can’t take that chance._

_Not with you._

Why? Why could she not take the chance with her. Clearly, by the way she was wrapped around her now, hands gliding along her skin, Lexa wanted her. Craved her. What stopped her from taking that chance? What was she hiding from Clarke that was so bad? Was there anything at all?

So many questions bubbled in her brain. Her frustration grew. Frustrated because they apparently couldn’t be together like they both wanted. Frustrated that Lexa was keeping something from her. Frustrated because nothing seemed to be going right in her world.

So she tried to get rid of it all in that moment. Let Lexa take all of her frustrations away from her body in the only way she could.

Clarke broke away from the languid kiss, breath ragged as she looked at Lexa, knowing exactly what she wanted.

“Fuck me.”

A stroke of confusion cross Lexa’s face before the tiniest of smirks formed.

“I thought I was about to.”

Clarke locked her legs around her waist and tightened them, jerking Lexa forward with enough force that it shook the dresser. Her hands tangled in sleep mused waves and brought Lexa’s lips as close as possible without actually touching.

“No. _Fuck_ me. Not like last night but like our first night,” Clarke husked,“ _Hard. Rough_.”

Lexa’s eyes locked with her’s, something swimming in them before becoming cloudy with lust.

“Fine.”

And then she was no longer on the dresser. Suddenly feeling airborne before her back hit the her bed and Lexa towered above her. Hands clasped around her wrists, pinning them to the mattress and making her squirm. Green eyes narrowed before Lexa leaned down, pillowy lips trailing over her jaw before settling at the skin behind her ear.

“You’ll keep your hands there,” Lexa said with a small squeeze of her hands,“Or else I’ll stop and go home and you’ll get nothing.”

It took all of her willpower to nod, gripping at the sheet under her hands so they wouldn’t move to feel Lexa’s skin.

Lexa wasted no time moving down her body. Neck, breasts, stomach, hips, thighs. She was everywhere. Clarke almost lost her grip when she tongue was suddenly on her, in her. Her back arched, a moan escaping from parted lips. Her hips bucked, urging Lexa to go faster, harder.

She could feel everything rising in her chest as she chased her orgasm. Clarke needed this. Needed the release to quell some of the anger and disappointment raging together in her chest.

She silently hoped Lexa wouldn’t notice the lone tear that slipped from the corner of her eye and disappeared into golden curls.

* * *

**Shift In POV (Lexa)**

Lexa skimmed her fingers over the small red lines along Clarke’s back. She sighed deeply. She knew why the blonde asked her to go such a thing. To take away the feeling of frustration and anger that she could feel leaving her in waves. Clarke wanted the pain to help push it back. Wanted to receive and give orgasm after orgasm. Use it all to disguise her feelings.

And Lexa couldn’t blame her.

The brunette knew this was a turning point for them. But she couldn’t deduce if it was good or bad. With this new….arrangement she was closer to Clarke. At least a little. For both her own self and her job of protecting her. It hurt to see Clarke this upset that they couldn’t be together how they wanted. And Lexa felt bad for going back and forth. One second saying she couldn’t and then saying she could…kind of.

In all honestly, it wasn’t fair to either of them, but it sure as hell wasn’t fair to Clarke.

Lexa was lying to her.

If Clarke ever found out that she was here only because she was hired by her parents to watch over her she’d be a little more than frustrated. She’d probably outright hate Lexa’s guts. Maybe even think that Lexa was only using her as a mere fling while also doing her job.

But Lexa knew that wasn’t the case. Lexa felt more for Clarke than she ever thought possible. It was completely different from how she’d felt about Costia. Yes, she had loved the woman and she would always hold a special place in her heart but there was something more to Clarke. Something that called to Lexa. She just couldn’t let Clarke know the full extent of her feelings for it would surely put her in some kind of danger if anyone ever found out. it was bad enough she was here now, laying naked in Clarke’s bed while she slept.

She was selfish. Probably for the first time since losing Costia. She tried to control the urges but they grew too much. It seemed nearly impossible for her to leave Clarke alone and watching over her every day didn’t help. Lexa knew she was putting, not only herself, but Clarke as well in danger. But there was something in her brain that didn’t care. That was trying to tell her it would be alright in the end.

But nothing ever was.

“Love is weakness,” Lexa whispered as she retracted her hand away from pale skin.

She slowly stood from the bed, careful not to wake the blonde, and moved through the moon lit bedroom. Reaching the living room Lexa quietly found her clothes and began pulling them on. Once dressed, she made sure to do a quick check of Clarke’s apartment before checking in on her once more.

Lexa stood in the threshold, leaning against the frame and staring at Clarke’s exposed back. The moon light sprawled across her form from the open curtains. She drank in the sight, wondering if each night she spent with Clarke she’d stare long and hard at her in the midst of sleep before taking her leave. It didn’t hurt to have the beautiful image ingrained in her mind.

Deciding it would be best to move back to her apartment Lexa pushed away from the frame, wiping a hand over her face as she slowly turned, one last peak at Clarke’s back following.

It was quick.

Enough to stop her in her tracks.

The little red light that disappeared fast enough to make Lexa think she’d imagined it.

Her heart raced, her body forming to the wall as she shuffled over to the window, carefully making sure Clarke was still breathing. Her chest eased a bit when Clarke shuffled a bit and grumbled sleepily. Steeling herself, Lexa quickly peaked around the window, eyes searching for any movement in the direction the light had most likely come from. Green eyes trailed over the rooftop of the building across from Clarke’s, waiting for any sudden or unusual movement.

Lexa calmed her breathing and waited. Ready to throw herself in front of the window if the light suddenly appeared once again. She counted slowly in her head eyes still searching the rooftops.

_1…_

_2…_

_3…_

_4…_

_5…There!_

Her gaze hardened, eyes zeroing in on the small movement at the far right of the rooftop. Just the slightest of shadows moving enough to not be a trick of the eye. When her eyes adjusted it was enough to see the outline of the person shifting the rifle into a better position and Lexa moved

She blocked the window. Ready and waiting. She’d give her life to protect the woman. Even if the rational decision would have been to wake Clarke she couldn’t take that chance. In the whatever seconds it would take to move across to the bed and wake the woman the sniper could take his shot. Lexa knew this, was prepared for this.

What she wasn’t prepared for was the hand that raised in the air, slowly waving to her as if greeting her.

Lexa stumbled back a step. Clearly confused. She didn’t know this person. Surely if someone she worked with had been assigned to be a sniper lookout for Clarke’s protection then she would have been the first to know. This…this was something else. Someone clearly toying with her.

Her phone, long forgotten and still sitting in the back pocket of her jeans, buzzed twice at an incoming message. Without removing her eyes from the spot on the roof she slowly pulled it out and held it up high enough to still have the sniper in her field of vision should he move.

_“She’s pretty when she’s sleeping. Isn’t she? Better keep that one close.”_

The text stung her eyes. Made her whole body clench in both anger and fear. This was why she was here. Whatever Clarke’s parents were afraid of was obviously here.

Lexa moved her eyes back fully onto the sniper and tensed when he stood, gun strapped over his shoulder. With a quick wave, the sniper was moving, disappearing into the shadows and leaving Lexa clueless and somewhat worried. This was worse than what she thought she was getting into. She knew Clarke’s parents were high profile and may be pursued by a criminal or two…but a sniper on their daughter? This wasn’t what she was expecting at all.

When no further movement was spotted Lexa slightly relaxed. She quickly closed the curtains and moved away from the window. There was no way she could go back to her apartment now, not after what she just witnessed. She’d be a nervous wreck the rest of the night.

Knowing she wasn’t going to get any sleep, Lexa moved over to the sleeping blonde. She didn’t quite like her sleeping in the bed when a sniper was just aiming at her all of five minutes ago. Lexa carefully maneuvered the blonde onto her back, being careful not to wake her, before lifting her into her arms, still wrapped in the blanket.

Lexa moved her towards the couch, thankful that all the windows in the rest of the apartment were covered. She gently sat Clarke down, stilling when she mumbled and shifted to get comfortable again. Once she was sure she wasn’t going to awaken, Lexa plopped down on the floor. She let her head lulled back and stare at the supple skin of Clarke’s face. The way her lips parted slight to welcome in new breathes of oxygen. Her nose wrinkling lightly at the cool breeze against it.

Lexa had thought about going after the sniper but knew it was too risky. For all she knew they could have been trying to lure her away in order for someone else to slip in and finish the job. Thankfully she never listened to the un-rational side of herself. She couldn’t leave Clarke unprotected and defenseless. It would’ve been stupid of her to do so. Clarke would have been a sitting duck.

Her eyes trailed over Clarke’s form once more, before resting her head back against the couch. She looked over to the digital clock in the corner near the TV and groaned when she realized she still had quite a bit of time to go before sunrise when she would be able to slip quietly back into her apartment.

For now, she would wait and protect if need be. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm honestly so tired right now to do my usual explaining at the end. if you have any questions please feel free to comment and I will answer them as soon as possible! 
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies!
> 
> Love to all! :)
> 
> xoxo


	8. I'm Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another look at five months ahead. Lexa gets a phone call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm soooo sorry. I know it feels like years since my last update. Life has been pretty much...well, hell. I've had quite a bit going on that's put me out of the mood for writing. I pretty much lost everything I had for writing. But recently I've been getting a lot of comments and even one special email that has lifted me enough to put myself back at my computer and write. It's kinda blue and straight forward but its a chapter none the less. My other stories are coming along. Slowly but surely. I'm not giving up on them until they're finished, so don't worry about that. Thank you to everyone who has been keeping up with my stories and waiting for the next chapters to come out! I'm so sorry again to have kept you all waiting! 
> 
> Much love.

Five hours.

Five hours and nothing.

Clarke had long fallen asleep against her shoulder, her trembling hands never losing their grip on her shirt. Lexa was somewhat thankful for the blonde’s sudden trip into unconsciousness. Both for Clarke’s sake and her’s. The silence gave her opportunity to sit and calculate.

Calculate on just how she was going to get them out of this place.

Lexa carefully pried Clarke’s hands from her shirt before maneuvering her off her shoulder and carefully laying her down on the ground. She stood slowly, body stiff from sitting on the cold, hard concrete. Green eyes peered around the empty basement, only cobwebs catching her field of vision. A small window sat to her far right, and even though she knew it was an unlikely means of escape, Lexa decided to check it out.

If standing on her toes, Lexa was just tall enough to see out the dusty window. From her vantage point she could see two men standing next to a black SUV, smoking what looked to be joints. Guns were holstered at each one of their hips but the detail that caught Lexa’s eye the most was the dragon tattoo curling along one of the men’s neck. Flashes of the man back at the van had her mind storing the information away for future reference. There was no way two men just happened to have to same exact tattoo in the same area. She knew that with her years of training.

Just as Lexa fell back flat onto her feet, Clarke stirred behind her. A low groan producing from her lips as she sat up and rubbed at the back of her head. Lexa watched her cautiously, not sure just how the blonde was going to react to waking up still in their current predicament and she still being without a plan.

“Ugh, what happened?” Clarke said sluggishly as she sat back against the concrete wall.

Lexa took a step closer, her eyebrows pinching at the way Clarke rubbed her head.

“You fell asleep about thirty minutes after they threw us in here,” She watched Clarke lower her hand and rest her head back against the wall,“Did you hit your head when that guy threw you down?”

Blue eyes fluttered open and found purchase on Lexa. Clarke slowly shook her and stood from her spot.

“No, I’m fine, just a headache. But you hit that guy with your head pretty hard, didn’t you?”

It wasn’t until Clarke was ripping a piece of her shirt and pressing it against her forehead that Lexa realized she must have gotten injured. She hissed softly as the fabric came into contact with the open wound, but the pain didn’t distract her from noticing how close Clarke had gotten to her. They were almost nose to nose, Clarke’s eyes scanning her forehead seriously as she moved the scrap of shirt.

“It’s not deep so I don’t think you’ll need stitches. But you’ll have a pretty nasty headache. I’m not surprised you can’t feel it now. Probably too much adrenaline running through your system.”

Lexa choked on any words that she was trying to form as Clarke looked into her eyes. Her breath caught in her throat as she noticed blue eyes dart down to her lips for a few mere moments before looking away.

“Uh,” Clarke cleared her throat,“You should be fine. Let me look at your ribs though. I know they punched you a few times.”

She didn’t protest as Clarke lifted her shirt to expose her taunt stomach and ribs. With a quick glance down Lexa could see a few darkening bruises already forming and winced at the thought of the future pain. Clarke’s fingers prodded lightly though they still caused Lexa to wince a few times.

Clarke let her shirt drop after a few minutes and took a step back,“Well, it’s your lucky day. No broken ribs. Just some bruising and probably a little pain with breathing but that nothing that can’t be handled with some pain meds.”

Lexa’s head tilted to the side a bit as she listened to the blonde.

“You’ll make a great doctor, Clarke.”

Clarke’s eyes whipped up to her face, cheeks glowing a pretty pink.

“W-what?”

Lexa hadn’t even realized the words had slipped from her lips, thinking that she had spoken it in her own mind. She coughed slightly, starting to feel the pain in her ribs, before looking down and scuffing her shoe agains the floor.

“The way you speak, how you handled my injuries…I can tell just from that, that you’ll make a great doctor.”

Clarke looked stunned for a moment, cheeks burning even brighter, before she caught herself and turned away from Lexa.

“Thanks…I guess.”

Lexa quirked an eyebrow,“You guess? What, you don’t think you’ll make a good doctor?”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what is it, Clarke?”

Clarke sighed heavily,“Can we not do this now? I think we’ve got more important things to worry about.”

“There isn’t much that we can do now, Clarke. Even if I can get through the door there’s men with guns surrounding this place. We wouldn’t get out of here alive if we tried,” Lexa stressed.

Blonde locks glittered in the dim lighting as Clarke moved past Lexa and towards the window. The brunette didn’t even bother to turn and watch Clarke pointlessly struggle to open it, having already seen the padlock on it.

“It’s no use, Clarke,” Lexa said after listening to Clarke rattle the window for a few moments.

“There has to be something we can do. We can’t just be sitting ducks in here, Lexa.”

“As of now, we just need to wait. They said your dad had something they wanted and they would use you to get it. That means they’re not going to hurt you or otherwise they won’t get what they want.”

Clarke appeared next to her, eyes simmering with a hint of worry.

“But what’s to stop them from hurting you Lexa?”

Lexa turned her head and looked at the blonde softly,“Don’t worry about me, Clarke. I can handle my own.”

Clarke’s eyebrows pinched together, full of worry, mouth opening to respond only to be cut off by the sound of the basement door opening. Lexa quickly pushed Clarke behind her and back towards the wall, making sure to shield her completely with her body. Three men clambered down the wooden stairs and Lexa was sure to catch the detailed dragons marking their necks as she looked them over for weapons.

Only one carried a gun.

If she could get her hands on it maybe she could get them out of this.

The two gunless men advanced on them and Lexa quickly took a defensive stance. Both men stopped, body’s tensing at her sudden movement and hands automatically lifting in defense. The man with the gun huffed before stepping forward and drawing his gun and pointing it straight at Lexa’s head.

“Let’s not make this messy. Step away from the girl.”

Lexa never flinched from her stance. She could feel Clarke trembling behind her and it only steeled her determination further.

She wasn’t letting them take Clarke without a fight.

* * *

 

_Five months ago…_

“So, what you’re telling me is that you and Clarke slept together and just as you were about to leave you spotted a sniper trying to target Clarke?”

Lexa sighed and rubbed her temples helplessly.

“For the hundredth time, Anya… _yes_. How many times do you need me to say it?”

Anya stared her down, leaned back in her seat at Lexa’s kitchen table, arms folded across her chest.

“I just find it hard to believe that you slept with your client, Miss ‘I-don’t-mix-work-and-pleasure’.”

Lexa rolled her eyes, hands slamming down against the table and pushing up onto her feet,“If you’re not going to take this seriously then you can leave.”

Anya chuckled deeply before sitting up and raising her hands in defeat.

“Okay, okay. What happened next?”

She went on to explain the rest of the night. How, after moving Clarke to the couch, she never left her side. Although she may have left out the part of her eyes never leaving Clarke’s sleeping face or softly brushing her hair away from her face multiple times. That was better kept to herself.

“So what’s your next move?” Anya said as she leaned forward and placed her arms on the table in front of her,“You can’t very well spend every night in Clark’s apartment watching for snipers every night.”

Lexa bit the inside of her cheek, her eyes scanning the surrounding rooftops outside her kitchen window for anything unusual. She knew something was off from the beginning. The texts were what set her off the most. They knew who she was. Knew she was protecting Clarke.

“Lexa.”

Green eyes snapped away from the window, landing on a now standing Anya.

“What, Anya?”

“What’s your next move? Your undercover position has obviously been compromised. You need to tell boss you nee—.”

“No,” Lexa firmly said,“He’s not pulling me out of this. There’s something else going on. You know me, I never slip up when it comes to undercover. There has to be more at play here. Something we aren't seeing. And Clarke’s in the middle of it so there’s no way I’m going to be forced out.”

“And what happens if they kill you just to get to her? Is that really something you’re willing to do? Die for some client you’ve been sleeping with?” Anya asked as she stepped closer.

_She’s not just a client._

Those were the words Lexa wanted nothing more than to voice but she knew if she did Anya would certainly be on her case even more. After watching her go through everything that happened with Costia, Lexa knew Anya would never let her anywhere near Clarke again if she knew she harbored any type of feelings that were more than just professional.

Lexa turned back to the window, leaned against the wall next to it and sighed deeply.

“It’s my job, Anya.”

* * *

A bitter sigh rolled from Lexa’s lips as she curled herself further into the darkness of the alley she was currently hiding in. The sound of Clarke’s laughter found it’s way into her ears and her eyes immediately zeroed in on the blonde. Clarke, along with a few of her fellow classmates, were sitting at an outside table of a small restaurant. Plates of leftover lunch were pushed aside to make room for their textbooks for a quick study session.

Lexa stayed vigilant, never letting her eyes linger on Clarke for too long in fear of missing just the slightest detail that may put the blonde in danger. So far, the only ‘danger’ she could spot was one of Clarke’s classmates staring at her a bit longer than what she was comfortable with.

The young man wasn’t being very subtle.

Thankfully, Lexa was resourceful and she knew everything she needed to know about all of Clarke’s classmates.

Josh, the young man who was still currently staring at Clarke, wasn’t getting on Lexa’s good side. Aside from his squeaky clean background check, he gave her a bad vibe.

The man’s brown eyes lingered a little longer below Clarke’s face than Lexa thought appropriate.

And when Clarke stood up to pack her things those eyes settled even further down.

And her bad vibe returned when everyone made their way towards their other classes.

Everyone besides Josh.

Lexa stomped out the dark alley, moving quickly but quietly to catch up to both Clarke and Josh as they made their way down the sidewalk. She kept her head down, brunette waves pulled back and covered by a simple hat, eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses. Lexa could hear them chattering away, a light giggle sounding from Clarke as she bumped into Josh’s arm.

And Lexa caught up just in time to hear something that made her blood boil.

“So…Harper said you aren’t seeing anyone at the moment. Is that right?”

Lexa watched as Clarke looked up at Josh, obviously somewhat taken back.

Clarke shook her head, sighed and let out a short chuckle,“No. No, I don’t believe so.”

Josh’s head turned to the blonde, eyebrows shifting in confusion.

“You believe so?”

Lexa could see Clarke’s shoulders visibly slump.

“Its…its, uh, complicated,” Clarke shook herself from her spiraling mood before looking up at Josh,“But no. I’m not seeing anyone. Why do you ask?”

“Well, there’s this party at this frat house this Saturday. I was, um, I was wondering if maybe you’d like to come with me.”

Clarke stopped walking for a moment as she looked at the man, “You mean…like a date?”

Josh’s hand found it’s way onto Clarke’s arm and Lexa had to physically stop herself from pulling it off.

“Only if you want it to be a date. If you don’t we can just go as friends. I’m totally cool with that.”

Lexa’s eyes narrowed, watching Josh’s body movements like a hawk. There was just something in his eyes that didn’t sit well in her stomach. Clarke smiled up at him before continuing to shuffle forward.

“I’ll think about it. I’ve got a few tests coming up that I really need to prepare for first. How about I let you know Friday?”

It was slight, but Lexa could see the subtle scrunch of Josh’s nose. Though he was quick to cover it with a bright smile before Clarke could notice.

“Sounds good to me. You’ve got my number already. Just text me when you decide,” Josh quickly wrapped Clarke in a side hug before pulling away, “I’ll see you later Clarke.”

Clarke smiled and waved as Josh made his way across the street before continuing to make her way to her own class.

Lexa stayed in her spot for a moment. Her blood boiled at the thought of Josh wanting to take Clarke out on a date. Her mind fought between doing her job by following Clarke or following Josh and making sure he knew to stay away from the blonde.

Just as she made up her mind, half way to stepping in Josh’s direction, the sharp vibration of her phone stopped her in her tracks. With one last glare to Josh’s back Lexa pulled the buzzing device from her back pocket. Her eyebrows scrunched in confusion as she stared down at the screen, her boss’s name dauntingly staring back at her.

Knowing he hated calling twice, Lexa quickly accepted the call.

“Hey, boss. What’s up?”

“My office, Woods. Twenty minutes.”

The dial tone filled her ears moments later and Lexa was momentarily taken back at the swiftness of the call. Normally her boss gave a bit more instruction; not just five words before hanging up. He was precise. Things done with every last detail put into mind....even an office visit. It didn’t make sense for him to randomly call out of the blue and expect her in his office in twenty minutes.

At least it didn’t make sense until the next text that she received moments later.

The device buzzed in her hand once more; Anya’s name flashing across her screen signaling a text message. And finally after reading the text her boss’s sudden phone call made sense. A bitter laugh rolled off Lexa’s lips before stuffing her phone back into her pocket and striding down the street towards her boss’s office, the text sounding in her head over and over.

**_“I’m sorry. I can’t let you risk your life for her.”_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it's enough to keep you all satisfied until the next one! Don't be afraid to leave a comment, let me know what story you'd like to see updated next! :)
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies!
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> And Happy Pride! <3

**Author's Note:**

> So....how'd I do?
> 
> I do have to say this is a little different from what I'm used to writing so it may be a little bad at first. But I think I'll get the hang of it as I dive deeper into the story! 
> 
> Until next time, Lovelies!
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> xoxo
> 
> You guys can follow me on tumblr @clexa-15. I'll post little sneak peaks of future chapters here and there for this story as well as my others! :)


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